Notes
by angel718
Summary: Class time. Fiyero is bored, Galinda isn't speaking to him...who knows why...and the green girl is sitting on his other side. What's a brainless guy to do? K plus for now.
1. In Which Fiyero Is Bored

Author's Note: I know, I _really_ shouldn't be starting yet _another_ new story, but I just couldn't help myself.

Disclaimer: 'Nuff said right there.

Fiyero Tiggular heaved a deep sigh as he took a seat in Dr. Dillamond's classroom next to his girlfriend, Galinda Upland. Galinda had, for whatever reason, decided that she wasn't speaking to Fiyero that day, but they couldn't give any indication that anything was wrong. People would talk, and it wouldn't be in a good way.

She was already surrounded on three sides by crazily giggling admirers ("Oooh, Miss Galinda, your hair is absolutely gorgeousified!" exclaimed one particularly obsessive one) but they all knew to leave the seat to her left empty for him. All of his friends had already taken the seats in front of and behind him, all the better to gape at Galinda's slightly-less-attractive-than-her-but-still-single friends. The upshot of all of this was that the seat on Fiyero's own left was the only empty one in the room by the time the period was about to begin.

Elphaba Thropp swept into the room right on time and already in a mood to end all moods. She _hated _not getting to class early. Sighing, she began to search for an empty seat. Even if she'd arrived earlier, she would have been hard to miss, being the color of grass on a spring day, but being nearly late caused Fiyero to look up and see her. He found himself surreptitiously watching her struggle to find a seat, her eyebrows furrowing more and more until she was full out frowning.

"All right, class. Let's begin." Dr. Dillamond clip-clopped into the room, succeeding in nothing other than alerting the entire class to the fact that the verdant Miss Thropp had arrived and seemed unable to find somewhere to sit. She ignored their whispers and giggles, though, and finally spotted the empty place next to Fiyero. With an expression on her face that indicated her complete lack of satisfaction with her seating options, she walked over and sat down, immediately turning her attention to the Goat professor.

Dr. Dillamond began to speak, and Fiyero instantly tuned out. He had no interest in this class, so why bother trying to do well? It was a waste of time. He decided it would be more fun to watch the green girl take notes, but this turned out to be dull as well. Yawning, he pulled out a piece of paper.

**Do they bother you?**

He folded it into a square and slid it over to her, his friends occupied by staring at the fine female forms nearest them. She ignored its presence, so he systematically pushed it closer and closer until its sharp edge dug slightly into her arm.

Irritated, she seized the paper and read it quickly.

_**I don't know what you are talking about, but whatever it is, I highly doubt that it concerns you.**_

**Do you think I'm stupid? You must know.**

_**I must know that you're stupid? How interesting. At least you admit it.**_

He changed the subject then, because it was looking like if he didn't, he'd be losing his source of entertainment and he didn't think he could handle the boredom without losing his mind completely. **How can you take notes on this? It's so boring.**

Elphaba rolled her eyes. Clearly, he was going to continue to bother her, and if she didn't answer him, he'd probably start poking her or something equally childish.

_**Well, it's all very complicated, but I do this weird thing that is called "listening." Would you like me to explain the concept?**_

**Very funny. What I meant was that it's so ****boring**** that it's hard to ****listen**

Fiyero jumped a little as, all of a sudden, Galinda slid her arm through his. "That is absolutely ridiculodious," she whispered. For added effect, for he assumed one of her friends had made some kind of comment about the two of them, she placed her head on his shoulder and smiled innocently. He did his part by casually draping his arm around her, leaning it on the top of her chair.

The girl responded with a quiet "Oh. Well, anyway, did you _see _what that girl this morning was wearing? Talk about ridiculodious!"

"I know!" Galinda nearly fell out of her seat with fervor. "It was so _bad!"_

Fiyero returned to the note and added: **Anyway, do you actually like this class?**

Elphaba was growing steadily more annoyed, and her foot began to tap impatiently as she hastily wrote her response, making no effort to write neatly. _**I do, as a matter of fact.**_

**Why?**

_**Again, you are sticking your nose in somewhere that does not concern you.**_

**What are you talking about?**

Elphaba chuckled rather dangerously under her breath. He couldn't just leave her _alone _to take her notes in peace, could he? _**My personal life and anything else that has anything to do with me concerns **__**only**__** me. Now, if you don't mind, I'd like to continue listening to this lecture. That's not a problem, is it?**_

**Not at all.**

_**Great. Thank you. Really.**_

Fiyero couldn't help wondering how she managed to come off sounding so incredibly sarcastic in a note, but decided it was probably best to leave her alone.

AN2: Read and review! And I think I'm putting this on as well, so if you have a member name there and you want to actually rate, feel free. I will be continuing this (and "What Is This Feeling?") soon, I promise. And I am taking suggestions for both.


	2. In Which a Test Is Announced

AN: Yeah, I know "What Is This Feeling?" was going to get top priority, but I couldn't resist. :) I'm sorry it's kind of short, but I got a huge response to my first chapter, so I just banged this out for y'all. Hope you like it!

Disclaimer: Yeah.

**Ahh, so I guess you don't mind me too much do you, Miss Thropp? You ****are**** sitting next to me again, after all. **Fiyero grinned to himself as he passed the note over to Elphaba. She'd been running behind again that day and ended up sitting next to him for the second time, and he just couldn't resist teasing her.

Bothering Elphaba when she wasn't having a good day, however, was a bit like poking a sleeping Dragon repeatedly with a sharp stick. _**Oh, so you **__**do**__** know my name, then, Master Fiyero? Amazing. And in case you didn't notice, the seat next to you is the only empty one in the room. Does that tell you something?**_ S he was absolutely fuming. Again, she'd been late. _Again. _And _again, _she'd been forced to sit next to someone, instead of someone being forced to sit next to her. She liked the latter quite a bit more.

**So it ****does**** make a difference to you that I know who you are!**

_**You are an idiot.**_Elphaba breathed deeply as she shoved the note over to him. Was she being harsh? Perhaps. Did she care? Not particularly. It wasn't like it was bothering him. Most likely, he was talking to her because he was bored. She wasn't stupid.

**Not an idiot. Just brainless. There's a difference. **

_**Is there? **_

**Why do I get the feeling that you don't like me very much?**

_**I don't know…do you have a history of paranoia in your family? That could have something to do with it.**_

**No, actually, I don't think I do.**

_**Hmm. Well then I can't fathom why you would get that vibe. You see, I don't make it a practice to dislike people that I don't know. Strange, isn't it?**_

**Is that supposed to be a hint?**

_**Are you actually attempting to see things at something other than face value? **_

**Are you being a hypocrite, Miss Elphaba? Because I seem to recall that you just wrote…what was it, now? Oh, right: "You see, I don't make it a practice to dislike people that I don't know."**

_**Ooh. I'm deeply wounded.**_

**Seriously, though, I haven't…you know what? Never mind.**

_**I'm intrigued now.**_

**Hey, that's quite an accomplishment on my part, isn't it? But, ha, ha, I'm not telling you!**

_**You are such a child. **_

No response for a few minutes. Elphaba found herself periodically glancing at Fiyero out of the corner of her eye while taking notes on the day's lecture. As much as she hated to admit it, she actually _was _intrigued. What could he have been about to say?

**Hey, did he just say something about a test???? **Fiyero's handwriting had grown messier with panic.

_**Yes, he did.**_

**What? When???**

_**That would be next week.**_

**I hate to do this to you, but…**

_**Just write it.**_

**Can I borrow your notes?**

_**I told you that you should be taking your own…**_

**Come on, please?**

_**I need them.**_

**Study with me, then? I know for a fact that none of my friends took any notes either, and you know for a fact that Galinda didn't.**

_**I work better on my own.**_

**If I fail, you'll have it on your conscience. Can you live with the torment?**

_**I think I'll survive.**_

**You can study first, if you want, and then just help me later…**

_**Are you going to be annoyingly persistent until I say yes?**_

**Yes.**

_**All right. Fine. But I'm using them first.**_

**Thank you.**

Elphaba groaned as the class came to an end. What had she just gotten herself into?

AN: Please review!! Let me know how I did.


	3. In Which A Study Date Is Decided

Disclaimer: Wicked is _not mine_.

A.N. Not too many notes in this chapter, but it makes it easier to write.

**When do you think we should start?**

_**Why are you obsessing over this test?**_

**Because, Dillamond said that if I don't pass I'll have to get a tutor, and I can't be bothered. I don't have that much time to study.**

_Fiyero! I cannot believe that you haven't tried to apologize to me yet! _Galinda had snatched the piece of paper right off of Fiyero's desk and scribbled her message in large, cursive letters, while remaining completely clueless to the rest of the note's contents.

Fiyero raised his eyebrows, though not at all surprised by his girlfriend's obliviousness. **I'm not exactly sure what I did, to be honest.**

_Never mind, I've decided that if you take me dancing tonight, I'll manage to forgive you!_

**So I'll be picking you up around eight?**

_Great! I'll be waiting! _

No, she wouldn't. He would be waiting for her while she took her time getting ready and the minutes ticked slowly by. Quickly, he rewrote his sentence to Elphaba and passed the paper to her, gesturing to show her where to read.

_**So you think that passing one test is going to be the difference between Doctor Dillamond forcing you to get a tutor and you sailing off to dance through life some more? You amuse me, I must say. **_And Galinda amused her as well. Did Fiyero really think that pointing to where she was supposed to start reading would do any good?

**You are a very harsh person.**

…_**Your point?**_

**There isn't one, I guess---**

_Fiyero, dear, I'm going to be wearing a sky blue dress tonight. In case you wanted to matchify your tie to it._

**Thank you for telling me that.**

_Of course, dear._

**There isn't one, I just thought you should know. And I am hoping to do well on this.**

_**I'm fully aware.**_

**You're fully aware of what?**

_**That I'm a harsh person. **_

**You don't believe me, do you?**

_**What, that you hope to do well on this test? Well, Master Fiyero, I don't want to be a "hypocrite," so I think I'll just keep my pen quiet.**_

**Fine. When do you want to begin?**

_**How about you pick? You're the one with the sparkling social life, if you recall.**_

**All right…tomorrow, then?**

_**Fine.**_

Dillamond released the class then, and Elphaba leapt to her feet and had escaped from the room before Fiyero had even noticed that the class was over. He turned to Galinda and offered her an arm, which she took with a smile.

_**Break………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..**_

Elphaba was perched on her bed reading a book when Fiyero knocked at the door.

"Miss Elphaba, don't you dare answer that. I'm not ready!" Galinda warned her roomie as she ran a brush through her golden curls.

Elphaba ignored her and stuck her head out the door. "Come to pick up Miss Galinda, I assume?"

"Good evening, Miss Elphaba," He said, smiling slightly. "Is she about ready?"

She peered over her shoulder into the room momentarily without bothering with a response to his greeting. "Miss Galinda is currently ripping the room apart in search of a sky blue hair ribbon that is an exact match to her dress. This may be a while, in case you'd like to go get a drink or something." He laughed. She didn't. "I'm serious, you know."

Galinda's eyes widened as she noted that Elphaba was actually _talking to Fiyero_. The nerve! "_Elphaba!_" Forget propriety, this was urgent! What if Fiyero saw her looking like this?

"Just a moment, Galinda is trying to get my attention," she informed him. "What?" she added, turning her head so that she was looking directly at the distraught blonde.

"Close that door immediately!" Galinda snarled, eyes wide.

"I've been ordered to close this door immediately, in case you're curious." Elphaba didn't make any move to shut the door.

Fiyero bit back another laugh. "Well, while we're waiting, do you want to come out here and talk?"

"Not especially. You see, I've got quite a bit of studying to do this fine evening," Elphaba waved a thick volume in his face, "and, as with Miss Galinda you never know just how long you'll be waiting, I may fall behind if I talk with you."

He tilted his head. "Why are you like that?"

She imitated his movement. "What are you talking about?"

_"Elphaba!" _

"Duty calls, Master Fiyero. Good evening." And she shut the door. "_What_?"

"Are you _purposely_ trying to ruin my evening? Because if you are, you couldn't be doing a better job!" Galinda huffed.

Elphaba snorted and flopped backwards onto her bed, right on top of a pile of discarded hair ribbons. She rolled over and stared at them. "Could you possibly keep your piles of junk on your _own_ bed?" she demanded, sweeping the pile onto the floor.

Galinda gaped at her as though she had just committed a mortal sin, but apparently didn't care enough to stop her search for the perfect shade.

"Could this be it?" Elphaba dangled a blue ribbon in the air.

"That is _clearly _Robin's egg blue, _not_ sky blue, Miss Elphaba. Honestly, I would completely clash shades if I wore _that_!"

Elphaba widened her eyes dramatically. "Oh, woe is me! I am unfit to walk this planet because of my inability to differentiate between shades of blue! Someone kill me now!"

"Stop using so many big words! I can't understand what you're saying!" Galinda shrieked.

"Why do you think I did it?" Elphaba smirked wickedly and returned to her book. Sometimes it was just too tempting to resist.

Galinda, having located her ribbon, tied her hair up in a loose bun and swept out the door, slamming it behind her.

A.N.2 Guess what's coming next? It'll come faster if you review.


	4. Operation: MtdoubleGL Part I

Disclaimer: (Is a disclaimer)

_**8:30 in the library.**_

**What?**

**_Studying. Remember, it's that thing using books and notes…_**

**Well, you weren't being specific. How was I supposed to know?**

**_You were the one who was freaking out about that test._**

**Okay, fine. See you there.**

**_Fabulous._**

Elphaba tossed back her hair and refocused on Dr. Dillamond, not bothering to give Fiyero so much as another glance. He doubted she'd looked his way once, even when she was passing him notes. He surveyed her out of the corner of his eye, intrigued. How _did_ she manage to keep herself so isolated and cold? It suddenly hit him that he had never even seen her crack a smile, let alone laugh. All at once, the evening ahead went from Operation: Pass the Test to Operation: Make the Green Girl Laugh, or MtdoubleGL for short since it was easier to think.

_**Break…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..**_

Fiyero breathed a sigh of relief upon entering the empty library. At least no one was in there to witness this. Elphaba was already bent over a table reading over her notes, the green cast of her skin looking ethereal in the soft light. "Hey, didn't you know you were supposed to do that _with_ me?" he teased.

"Just because I have chosen to sacrifice my evening to help _you_ pass doesn't mean that I can only study with _you._" She snapped, clearly not in the most amazing of moods.

"Okay, okay. Sorry," he held out his hands in a surrendering gesture and sat down in the chair across from her. Operation: MtdoubleGL was decidedly _not_ off to a good start.

"What is an Ozma?" Elphaba inquired, choosing to start off with the easier questions and not bothering with any niceties.

"Oz's ma!" Fiyero grinned boyishly at his own pun.

Elphaba just stared at him with eyes that practically burned a hole in his face with their intensity. His grin faltered slightly. "Are you going to give me the actual answer or not?"

He sighed. "Queen of Oz."

"_Thank_ you." Her voice was unadulterated sarcasm. "Do you think you can manage to name them for me?"

He knew he should probably answer one correctly before resuming with his super secret operation, but he didn't actually know the answer. "Um…pass?"

She huffed loudly. "The Mendacious, the Warrior, the Librarian, the Scarcely Beloved, the Bilious, and Tippertarius."

He blinked in confusion. "How in Oz am I supposed to remember that?"

"That's not my problem. Now, the first Ozma, or Ozma the Mendacious, fell when…"

"The second Ozma knocked her over!" Fiyero practically bounced out of his seat in his excitement.

Every ounce of tolerance Elphaba had managed to build up seemed to evaporate. "If you are going to waste my _time_, you may as well just leave."

Fiyero pouted. "I'm just trying to make it a little more interesting…"

She shoved her notes across the table. "Your turn."

"What'm I supposed to do with these?"

"What do you think you're supposed to do with them?"

He sighed exaggeratedly and peered at the carefully written pages. "Okay…how did Ozma the Bilious die?"

"Rat poison." Elphaba replied promptly, as though this were as normal as saying, "It's supposed to be sunny tomorrow."

He raised his eyebrows as he continued to leaf through the sheets in search of something different to question her on. "That had to be kind of painful. Hey, my family's in here!"

"I guess you wouldn't notice, would you, if you're passing me notes all the time."

"Well, then I should be able to get those questions right, at least. Who are the royal family of the Vinkus?" He mimed writing and said, in an overly childish voice, "Mommy and Daddy!"

A small puff of air escaped Elphaba's nose, a sort-of-not-quite half laugh.

"And me, of course," he added as an afterthought.

She nodded briskly. "And you should probably know what you're _doing_ if you're going to rule one day."

He shrugged. "Hey, at least I wouldn't spend all of my country's economy on buying myself cute little puppies and evening gowns."

"I'm going to take a guess and say that that's your mother?"

"Wrong." He tilted his head and waited for her reaction.

"Do you have a sister, then?"

"I don't, in fact." He raised his eyebrows. Any minute now…

Her own eyes widened. "Not your father."

"Yep. He has a collection. No idea why, since Mom doesn't wear any of them. He says it's because they're very expensive and in the event I have a daughter, her clothing is already taken care of, but I think he just has a fetish."

AN: You like? Tell me!! FYI, the following ideas/quotes were given to me by The Pixess:

--Yero _trying _to make Elphie laugh

--The appearance of Yero's parents…although I _did _change some things

--"Now, the first Ozma…fell when…"

"The second Ozma knocked her over!"

Thanks Pixie:) If I missed anything, let me know.

Review, my pretties…or I will find you… (Maniacal laughter here)


	5. Operation: MtdoubleGL Part II

Disclaimer...

"A _fetish?_" Elphaba arched a single eyebrow at him.

He nodded. "And you should see him shop. It's actually hilarious… 'Ooh, look, it's got a _lace hem_! How clever…I simply _must_ pick it up. Son, your daughter will be the finest dressed woman in all of the Vinkus."

She coughed and turned her head away for a moment.

"We have a poodle, too. His name is Bartholomew." Fiyero informed her, grinning widely. "He doesn't like anybody except me. Probably has something to do with the fact that even though my father is the one who bought him, he ignores the poor thing, and my mother is constantly trying to get him dyed pink."

Elphaba couldn't handle it anymore. A tiny giggle burst from her lips, and she bowed her head to keep Fiyero from seeing the smile.

Fiyero leapt in the air triumphantly and pointed at her. "You laughed! YES!"

"No. I did not." She shook her head, having managed to control herself. "It's not funny, Fiyero. I mean it, if you're not going to study then leave."

"But I'm not finished telling you about Barty and his twin sister Lilia!"

"_Li_lia?" Elphaba was working very hard to keep from laughing now.

"Yes…Dad decided one puppy wasn't enough, so he went out and bought Lilia, who looks exactly the same as Bartholomew, only she's a girl. Mom keeps trying to get _her_ dyed blue. I think she's just confused."

Elphaba somehow managed to turn her laughter into a coughing fit, but Fiyero now decided that, to celebrate the triumphant success of MtdoubleGL, he would leap onto one of the wooden tables in the library. He then began to do some sort of tribal victory dance, complete with a chant. Poor Elphaba never had a chance.

"Stop!" She gasped out around her helpless giggles. He dismounted and sat again, clearing his throat and returning slowly to an ordinary expression.

"Sorry…I couldn't resist," he apologized half-heartedly, only wanting to make sure she didn't get mad at him. That would be just like her, too.

She snatched the papers from him and inquired, with a smile still in her voice, "Are you quite through now?"

"Yep."

"Good. Now…"

_**Break…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………**_

Elphaba glanced over at Fiyero after five minutes worth of silence had greeted her question. He was snoozing peacefully on the table, his hair falling into his face. She tried to ignore the butterflies that this awoke in her stomach and gave him a poke.

"No! Not the flying MARSHMALLOWS! NOOOOOOOOOO!" Fiyero shouted, swatting at the air a few feet away from Elphaba, before resuming his snoring. Annoyed and slightly amused, the undeterred Elphaba poked him as hard as she could. Fiyero's eyes shot open and he gazed around blearily. "Whaaapen?" he muttered confusedly, rubbing his side, which felt like it had just sustained a life-threatening injury.

"You fell asleep," Elphaba's cutting voice drilled right into his brain, causing him to wince, "and yelled something about flying marshmallows."

Fiyero shrugged. "No idea what you're talking about."

She sighed loudly. "I assume His Royal Highness is too exhausted to continue studying?"

"Nah. I think I can handle a few more questions."

"That's a shame, because I'm not doing any more tonight." She got to her feet and scooped everything into her arms.

He yawned. "Mmkay. Thanks anyway, Elphie."

She stared at him. "What did you call me?"

"Elphie. What, don't you like it?"

She rolled her eyes, shook her head and swept from the room without another word.

A.N. Sorry it took so long...I've been uber busy. "What Is This Feeling?" is getting next priority, so it may be a while. Sorry again...please don't try to punish me by not reviewing. (Which would backfire anyway coz then I just wouldn't update at all...)

LOVE YA!


	6. Galinda Has a SleepoverOh Sweet Oz

Even though Galinda had deluded herself into believing that the dorm she shared with Elphaba was hers solely, and that the green girl was just a pesky, unwelcome intruder, the fact remained that it was Elphaba's room, too. Thus, Elphaba saw no reason to knock before entering it, and the lack of knocking led to her walking in right smack in the middle of Galinda's impromptu slumber party with the Misses Something-or-other (Elphaba had never bothered to learn their names. Why did they matter?). She stood there for a few wordless seconds, staring as the three girls giggled and bounced up and down about something oh-so-very-exciting, before the sheer horror of the moment led her to shut the door and hasten away.

Elphaba swept back through the library doors and hurried right over to the nearest shelf of books. _Need…intellectual…stimulation…_ "Hey. Back so soon?" A very familiar voice rang in Elphaba's ears, and she spun around.

"What are you still doing here? I thought you avoided this place at all costs unless it was absolutely necessary." She snapped in return.

He shrugged. "I didn't feel like getting up. Why're you back here?" He stifled a yawn, but his eyes surveyed her with pure, alert curiosity.

She raised her eyebrows. "Why does it feel like I've told you in the past that my life is none of your business?" She put her fingers to her temples, as though attempting to see back in time. "Ah, yes, because I _have_. Funny how it doesn't appear to have sunk in."

"I wanna try to guess!" Fiyero decided. "Tell me if I get it right."

She rolled her eyes and said nothing.

"Your room was infested with rats. No, Galinda would have screamed loud enough for the Wizard to hear in the Emerald City if she saw a rat." He shot himself down and continued. "Galinda is in rainbows-unicorns-sparkles mode and you can't handle it. Galinda has decided that it would be a good idea to give someone a makeover and tell them that they're gonna be popular…Oh…" People in Galinda's room…Fiyero's eyes grew wide as a particularly frightening scenario occurred to him. "Is she having a sleepover?"

Elphaba made a tiny, disgusted noise, but said nothing.

"That's _it_, isn't it?" Fiyero crowed with triumph. He was so _good_ at this stuff!

Sensing that he would, once again, continue his new favorite hobby of annoying the crap out of her until she answered him, she conceded with a tiny nod.

"I _knew _it."

"I lasted five seconds before having the uncontrollable urge to stab myself to death with a toothpick," she said conversationally, trying to give him the clue that she was _not_ in a mood to be reckoned with.

It didn't work, of course. This was _Fiyero, _after all. "You couldn't do that. It would hurt. Plus, I'd miss you," he told her, with a childlike pout.

The book she'd been pulling from a high shelf proceeded to slip from her fingers with the shock of _that_ particular statement.

"I got it," he assured her, crouching down to do so. She was already there, and as they both reached for the book, his hand brushed hers. She jerked it back like he'd electrocuted her. "Sorry." He wasn't, actually. In fact, he just wanted to touch her again, but decided it would be best to keep that little tidbit a secret. He leapt to his feet and offered her his free hand, which she, being Elphaba, completely ignored in favor of getting up herself. "For you." He added, grinning and offering her the book. She nodded, which he took to be a thank you of sorts.

"You can't just sleep in the library, you know." Fiyero added, raising his eyebrows. "If you want to go to bed, I can go break up that sleepover right now."

"Don't trouble yourself. I can manage on my own."

"Okay," he sighed, defeated. "Well, I'm going, then. See you."

Nothing.

AN: Wicked not mine, you know the drill. SO SO SO SORRY that this is a filler. It seems to be all I can write these days. (Pouts). Give a review anyway? I'll love ya forever!


	7. Operation: BUwGUaTNtMHC is Introduced

**Disclaimer:** If I owned _Wicked_...I wouldn't write about it here.

**Author's Note: **Sorry! How long did this take me? Too long, I'm sure...I kind of explain in my profile, in case you care. Please R and R anyway...It's not a filler! Woohoo!! Well...not really, anyway. :)

Fiyero was the best dancer at Shiz; he had a fabulicious sense of humor; his taste in girls, clothing, extracurricular activities, and what color to dye his family pets was right on…in short, he was _fun_, hot and charming. He was not, on the other hand, a good listener. At all. So, when Elphaba told him not to bother breaking up his girlfriend's probably-against-university-rules sleepover, he heard her but…well…let's just say it didn't quite sink in.

_She didn't mean it, _he thought decisively, ignoring the fact that Elphaba had been very obvious about meaning it. As he moved toward the door, he glanced back at her once more. She had moved to a table by the window and now appeared to be deeply absorbed into reading her book. He tilted his head, wondering briefly about his sudden, insane urge to go give her a hug. "Bye, Elphie." Fiyero said, trying one last time to get her attention despite the fact that he'd already said goodbye.

Her head snapped up and she glared scary icicles in his general direction. "Do. Not. Call. Me. Elphie." She snarled.

He tilted his head. "Why do you look like you want to kill me?" There was a long, dangerous pause, during which he decided that the best possible route to prevent his own (potentially toothpick-related, if what she'd mentioned earlier meant anything) death was to backpedal. Quickly. "Right. Sorry. No more calling you Elphie."

"Great." She replied flatly. "Are you going to go away any time soon? I'm rather busy, and you are profoundly distracting."

"I was just going." He walked back toward the door, but he made the mistake of turning around with one foot in the corridor. "Can I just ask you why you're so violent? I mean, suicide-by-toothpick tendencies and urges to commit murder against adorable, innocent princes who never did anything to--"

Elphaba growled loudly and he hurried out.

Fiyero walked slowly down the darkened corridors on his way back to his room. But this was ridiculous! It wasn't even light outside yet…what was he doing going to _bed?_ He could go to Galinda's room. Maybe she was a little annoying sometimes…all right, a lot of the time…(after all, hadn't she gotten mad at him and not spoken to him for, like, three days for no apparent reason?) but she would be entertaining. Plus, he could break up the sleepover and score extra points with Elphie… Good plan. He began to whistle as he walked, impressed with his own genius.

When he reached the door to the suite-type room that Galinda and Elphie shared, he could already hear high-pitched female giggling that automatically pulled a wince onto his handsome face. _Noooo! It's rainbows-unicorns-sparkles mode to the power of three!_ But a malfunction of some sort (couldn't be a brain malfunction, since he didn't have a brain) caused him to knock, despite his misgivings. Galinda was his girlfriend, after all.

The door burst open revealing said girlfriend clad in a tiny pink nightdress and an enormous smile, clearly still leftover from the fit of hysteria she and her guests had been sharing moments before. "Fiyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrooooooooo!" she squealed. Ordinarily, this would have caused him some serious eardrum pain, but his eyes were glued to the hem of her nightie, which happened to be extremely distracting. Oh sweet Oz, he hadn't been prepared for that. Not, of course, that it was a _problem…_ "Did you come to surprise me?" Galinda's voice interrupted his happy thoughts. "How sweet!"

"Um…yeah! Yeah…surprise!" He managed at last.

Galinda gave another squeal. "One moment, dearest!" She hurried back to her friends and began to whisper at about fifty thousand light years per second.

"Oh, Miss Galinda, don't you _dare _worry about us!"

"No, no, dear, we'll see ourselves out. Do have fun!"

Their giddy responses to whatever she was saying were just loud enough for him to hear, and he heaved a mental sigh. This was the problem with not knowing what he was doing, ever. She probably thought he had all kinds of romantic plans…oops.

After her friends had disappeared, Galinda flashed him her famous smile. "Where are we going? I _do _have to change, after all."

"No you don't." The words were out of his mouth before he could stop them. Lurline, he was in for it now.

But she merely giggled and blushed a bit. "Don't be silly, what if someone sees us?"

He blinked. Elphaba sure would have smacked him (very painfully) for that... "Um…I thought maybe we'd just…take a walk or something."

The light in her baby blues flickered a bit. They weren't doing anything more _interesting_? Wasn't there a single party going on? No, there must not be. He would have taken her there if there were. And after all, a lot of people could see them if they were walking around campus… "Okay!" And she closed the door to change.

Fiyero exhaled, slightly disappointed, and settled himself in for a nice, long wait.

When Galinda finally reappeared, she was dressed in a long, hot pink dress with spaghetti straps and covered in glitter. She beamed at him. "All right! We can go!"

He wrinkled his brow. Elphaba would have had the good sense to wear something comfortable. He imagined Elphaba opening the door to the suite, clad as Galinda had been about an hour and a half ago and got rather…well…distracted…from his current situation.

"Fine!" Galinda huffed in the background of reality somewhere. "If you don't like the way I look, Fiyero, you could just tell me."

The tone of her voice snapped him back to the present rather fast. "You look amazing." He leaned in to give her a kiss, and she surrendered. When they broke apart at last, Fiyero realized something extremely disturbing:_ He didn't want to be with Galinda. The spark was gone._

He suffered through the walk, much of which was spent discussing future plans and public appearances together (all of which were already preplanned by Galinda, who seemed to be completely unaware of the lack of spark in their relationship), but once he was back safe in his room, he focused on the truth.

It was time to take on a more serious operation: Break Up with Galinda Upland. He paused a moment to think about that scenario and added, …and Try Not to Make Her Cry. He couldn't handle it if she cried…he'd just end up staying with her and he didn't know if he could stand it.

Operation: Break Up with Galinda Upland and Try Not to Make Her Cry (AKA Operation: BUwGUaTNtMHC) was on.


	8. Breaking Up Takes 1 and 2

Disclaimer here.

Author's Note: I'M SO SORRY for the long wait. It's pretty long, though, to make up for it. Please review!! (Big thanks to xxDefyGravityxx for being reviewer number fifty...Sorry for taking forever with that. So yeah, this chapter's for you, then. :))

The thing that Fiyero had forgotten while rushing off to save Elphaba from the horror that was Galinda having a sleepover was that the green girl wasn't in the room when he did so. Therefore, she had no idea that her room had been vacated of annoyances, and Fiyero's efforts (and his night of misery) were for naught.

When dawn broke the next morning, Elphaba lifted her head from the thick book on which she had fallen asleep and gazed around blearily. "Ugh," she murmured, tipping her head back to massage the crick out of her neck. "That's the last time I fall asleep in a library." She gathered her notes and headed for the door, not even bothering to care what would greet her in her room. Actually, she mused, it would give her great pleasure to wake her three tormentors.

She slammed the door as she entered, but only Galinda was present to be woken. "Where are those infernal nincompoops?" She demanded, staring around the room.

"…Huh?" Galinda muttered, still half asleep.

"The infernal nincompoops," Elphaba repeated distractedly, eyes still zooming around the room as though she suspected them of hiding so that they could play some sort of cruel prank on her.

"You know Elphaba, you should either speak in words that I can understand or shut up and let me sleep," Galinda snapped, clasping her pillow around her head to block out her roomie's voice.

Irritation rose inside Elphaba and she tugged the pillow away from her. "Your friends, _Glinda_. Where are your _friends_?"

Galinda seized her pillow back and chucked it as hard as she could at Elphaba. Seeing as she was still lying down, though, her aim was off (never mind that Elphaba was only inches away) and the ball of pink fluff careened toward the window. "It's _Ga_linda. With a _guh_!"

Elphaba laughed. It was just so easy…

"Why do you care where Pfannee and Shen Shen are, anyway? It's not as though they like you."

"It's not as though I like them, either," responded Elphaba, dodging the rest of the question expertly by reaching for Galinda's pillow and commenting, "By the way, I think you dropped this." With that, she spiked the pillow toward the blonde's head.

Galinda gave what Elphaba assumed was her version of a battle screech and tackled the green girl, smacking her repeatedly with the poor pillow (which seemed to be having quite a rough day so far…). Elphaba, her reflexes far better than those of our dear Miss Galinda, squirmed out of the way, seized her own pillow, and began to pummel the girl. Her fun was interrupted when a knock sounded at the door. Galinda gave a squeak of terror, obviously afraid that her curls were mussed or her makeup (which only Galinda would actually put on while preparing to go to sleep) smeared. She was at her mirror in a moment. Elphaba, on the other hand, was dressed in about a minute and swept out the door, knocking into Shen Shen's shoulder as she passed.

"Girls," she heard Galinda exclaiming as the door swung shut, "you will _never _guess what we did last night!"

Elphaba froze at the words. "We" couldn't possibly apply to Galinda and the two idiots who'd just entered the room. That was Galinda's "hot date with Fiyero" tone. Not that Elphaba cared. Not at all.

LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Fiyero stared blankly out the window at the slowly rising sun and attempted to think. (It would have freaked him out that he had resorted to such a thing if this wasn't so important.) But anyway, operation: BuwGU(otdoubleU)aTNtMHC (he figured that it might make her feel better to have her high social status mentioned in the operation name…as though she actually knew it existed) would probably be next to impossible, and thus took a lot of effort to plan. He launched himself off of his bed and began to pace. Forget planning. This was one of those things that had to get done immediately. If not sooner. He was halfway to the door before he was hit by an epiphany. For most people, this would be a normal thought: Oh, crap, can't do it yet, it's five am. But this was _Fiyero_, who avoided rational thought like the plague as much as possible. Enough said.

He got dressed, dawdling over his hair to make sure it was perfect, just in case he should run into Elphaba. He jumped at the thought. _That_ was kind of unexpected…well, not really, if he was going to be honest with himself. She was interesting, amusing, sarcastic, and he wanted to make her like him, wanted to know everything about her. She was so darn confusifying, though!

Fiyero realized suddenly that his comb was sticking out of the left side of his head. (He'd put it there in order to fold one arm across his chest, place the other elbow on top of it, and use the hand attached to the arm attached to that elbow to stroke his chin like he had a goatee.) It fell to the floor as he whipped his head around to make sure that his roommate was still asleep and hadn't witnessed anything out of the ordinary.

Finishing with his hair, he checked the clock. Primping and pondering had taken up a good two hours. Excellent. That meant he might be able to go and talk to Galinda. She was probably up, what with Elphaba as her roomie…he didn't see her as needing much sleep.

Unfortunately, he got to the door shortly after the re-arrival of Pfannee and Shen Shen, which meant that his ears were assaulted, even from outside of the room, by their ridiculous shrieks and giggles. _What? I thought I broke that up last night!_ He didn't trouble himself with attempting to figure this phenomenon out, but simply lifted his hand to knock. It was halfway to the door, but he stopped. If he broke up with her now, with two other people in the room, she would be humiliated. Plus there were two more people to murder him. Or, actually, depending on how you looked at it, there were two people who would be able to bear witness against Galinda should he end up dead…so maybe he'd be safe. He tilted his head from side to side, weighing his options with each new direction. Finally, he determined that the risks (possible painful death) outweighed the rewards (finally being free of the sparkly pink ball and chain that was this relationship). The only thing to do now was go back to his room and wait.

ANOTHER LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

History was Fiyero's new favorite subject, and the green girl was the reason why. When he'd first begun to pass her those notes during class, he'd never expected to actually like her…it kind of freaked him out. But now he found himself looking forward to the time spent in Doctor Dillamond's room, seeing what new and interesting thing she'd say.

When he and Galinda walked in, he spotted her. She sat alone, as she often did. (That puzzled him, too. He knew she had a sister, but Nessa never sat anywhere near her.) Galinda was already halfway to a seat that was rather far from Fiyero's destination. Quickly, he caught her hand and gestured to the ones closer to Elphaba. "What about those?"

She looked confused. "Why?"

Crap. Coming up with good reasons to do things had never been Fiyero's forte. "Well…" he trailed off lamely. What could he say that would make her listen?

"All of our friends are over _there_," Galinda reminded him, pointing. Just in case he couldn't see them for himself, he supposed.

He sighed. "You're right." When no one was paying attention, though, he seized a piece of paper and scrawled, **Sleep well last night?** Then he waited until Doctor Dillamond had turned to face the blackboard and tossed the note right at Elphaba. It landed smack in the middle of her desk, causing him to give a quiet cheer of jubilation at his superior aiming skills. Galinda gave him a strange look, and he turned his cheer into a cough. Then he grinned innocently and draped his arm around her to keep her from suspecting anything. She, unfazed, returned to her conversation with Shen Shen.

Elphaba, meanwhile, hadn't read the note just yet. It was sitting there, crumpled into a tiny ball and sending her mental vibes: _Open me. You never know what I might say…Come on. Do it._ "No," she muttered, and then groaned. Now she was talking to inanimate objects? Just lovely, really. She gave herself a mental slap. Who cared what the note said, anyway? Certainly not her.

When the class ended, however, she gave in and ripped the note open. However, she found its contents so unsatisfying (_No, Elphaba, unsatisfying implies an expectation for something good. You couldn't care less what he says or writes, remember?)_ that she didn't bother to respond at all.

Galinda grasped Fiyero's hand and beamed at him. "Dearest, I've got a lecture in ten minutes, but I promised Pfannee that I'd drop by to see her newest ball gown. Walk me there, will you?"

Fiyero took a deep breath. This was it. "Actually, Galinda, I wanted to talk to you. It's kind of important. Do you think Pfannee would mind if you went during lunch?"

She wrinkled her brow. "Couldn't we talk at lunch? There's more time, and I _did _promise."

Fiyero barely heard his own faint, "Sure. Why not?" Galinda, of course, completely missed the sarcasm.

THE THIRD LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

By lunch, Fiyero felt like he was going insane. He'd run through every possible scenario for this break up, and each and every one had ended in Galinda either a: crying or b: throwing things at him. Naturally, Fiyero determined that the best possible course of action would be to blurt it all out, leap up and run away at top speed.

The two had set up a meeting place earlier, so there Fiyero sat when lunchtime came. He wracked his brains carefully for the most tactful way to say, "I'd rather spend every waking moment with your room mate than the occasional eight or ten hours with you." And there he continued to sit. Alone. Until there were only ten minutes left of lunch.

His patience now completely gone, Fiyero decided that it would be smarter to go and see if Galinda was in her dorm. When he knocked, however, it was Elphaba who answered. "Hi Elphie," he said automatically, having forgotten her views on the nickname.

"I am trying to decide whether to slam the door in your face for that," she told him, speaking as casually as though this were normal.

He sighed. "Elphaba. Sorry." Not really.

She snorted. "Not really. What do you want, anyway?"

"Galinda here?" he tried hopefully. There was still a chance to get this over with.

"No. She rushed in earlier babbling about coffee, Shen Shen and breakups, changed her earrings and left."

"NOOOOOOOOOO!!!" howled Fiyero, slamming his head against the doorframe a few times. She regarded him with a mixture of amusement and something that he couldn't quite read. "She didn't happen to mention meeting me for lunch, then?" he added, attempting to save face.

"Not unless comforting Shen Shen over coffee now equals nauseatingly cute lunch with Fiyero. Incidentally, you just saw her in history. I had no idea you would miss her so much after a few short hours."

He shuddered. "Elphaba. Do not even joke about such things."

She raised her eyebrows, but didn't respond.

"Actually," he continued, unable to stop himself, "I want to break up with her."

For a moment, the green girl just stared.


	9. Third Time's the Charm

Disclaimer: Yeah, okay.

Author's Note: 101 REVIEWS!!!!! (Does happy dance to celebrate) I have NEVER had that many reviews before!! YAY!! Many many thanks to ME! (who is not actually me) my anonymous 100th reviewer. (I'll dedicate the next chappie to you.) This chapter goes to TryDefyingGravity, because she nominated this fic for Thespian-wolf's "Wicked" fanfic contest!! I LOVE YOU!! (Nominations end Nov. 30. Remember to nominate your favorite authors/stories. It'll be fun! I'm still trying to pick things to nominate...too many good things!!) Anyway, read!

This was going very, very wrong. Elphaba was not supposed to know…it had just kind of slipped out. Elphaba, however, sat on her bed, folded her legs Indian style and surveyed Fiyero as though he was a vaguely boring puzzle that would simply have to do until something more interesting came along. "You want to break up with her," she repeated flatly. "Well, thank you very much for sharing. I suggest you tell her that, as I doubt that she can figure it out on her own."

He walked over to sit beside her. "Well, that's why she was supposed to meet me for lunch, but…" He shrugged helplessly to indicate Galinda's tendency to simply change plans when they didn't suit her.

Elphaba was staring at him, looking as though she hadn't heard a word he'd said. "Why are you sitting there?"

"I don't know. It's just…easier to talk to you here."

She then, being Elphaba Thropp, proceeded to ruin this by getting to her feet and heading to the door. "In her defense, Fiyero, which you know I wouldn't come to without an excellent reason, she went to comfort Shenshen, so she actually had good intentions. Now, I've got to go, as the last thing I want is to be late for class on account of you, and I suggest you leave as well."

He sighed loudly. "You know, you're not a very comforting person."

"I wouldn't expect myself to be, since I wasn't trying." With these words, she swept from the room. "Out, I need to lock it." She ordered, pausing just outside.

He decided that obeying, in this situation, was far wiser than striking up an argument. "Where are you going?" He asked as she locked the door. "Let me walk you." But she practically sprinted down the hallway, ignoring him completely. He could have caught her, actually, but he figured (lots of thought-type things going on today. Strange.) that stalking her would result in her getting exceedingly aggravated. And angry Elphaba equaled bad things. It was, after all, practically a miracle that he had evaded death by toothpick not long ago, and the last thing he wanted was to provoke such a terrendible thing.

LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Elphaba practically supersped away from Fiyero, hanging on to the desperate hope that doing so would keep her from actually wanting him to walk her to class. This mental admission actually stunned her, since she'd never before allowed herself to think about it. And he was breaking up with Galinda. _You don't care,_ her mind screamed at her. _Why in **Oz** would you care?_ She shouldn't, after all. And didn't. Definitely not. And her stomach certainly hadn't squirmed (in an oddly pleasant fashion) when he'd sat next to her back in the dorm. Nope. It had simply been…nausea. From lunch. Which she had actually eaten. Right. She took the deepest possible breath and exhaled, trying to push all thoughts of Fiyero—and his eyes, and the fact that he always smiled at her, no matter what, and the fact that he was breaking up with Galinda—to the back of her mind. It didn't matter.

LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Fiyero was beyond antsy. He was pacing around his dorm so much that a path had actually been repeatedly traced into the carpet. His roommate, fortunately, was out somewhere, presumably trying to score with a rebounding Shenshen. What in the name of all things Ozian was he supposed to say to break up with Galinda? After all, the whole, "You're annoying, catch you later," thing would never work. It was way too mean, and not even true. Really. Most of the time. He could try to pin it on himself. Yes, that would be perfect. Feeling better, he replaced his comb (He had taken to combing his hair while thinking—it seemed to work perfectly, as though he simply needed to improve the circulation to his head in order to come up with genius ideas) and walked toward the door. Galinda was probably looking for him. It was dinnertime, after all, and they always ate together.

She wasn't hard to find. One could always hear her and see a giant mob of people before actually seeing _her_. Again, a seat had been left open for him, and as he sat she draped her arms around his neck and squealed something unintelligible (or maybe he just wasn't listening).

"Want to go for a walk? Outside?" he suggested, trying not to sound seductive or flirtatious or anything that could be remotely construed as romantic. She, apparently, was clueless to his tone, as a toothy grin filled her face.

"I would love to," she breathed, and giggled. Pfannee raised her eyebrows and smirked oh-so-slightly. Shenshen was mysteriously absent from the table.

Fiyero's stomach sank. _**No! Noooooo! It didn't work!!!!**_ "Great." He managed.

She sidestepped a little as they walked, brushing his hand gently with hers, in a you-know-you-want-to-hold-hands-with-me sort of way. He pretended he didn't notice. "What did you want to talk about earlier, Fiyero?" she asked, a bit flirtatiously.

He rubbed the back of his neck self-consciously. "Well…let's wait until we're a bit further away from here." He realized too late that she could (and would) misinterpret this and quickly added, "It's kind of important." He crossed his fingers, counting on his tone to help him out.

"Okay." She sounded puzzled, having clearly just realized that this was serious.

He smiled a little. Freedom beckoned at last! Suddenly, though, he was hit with a wave of guilt. She hadn't done anything, really, and he was being horrible. They were pretty far to the back of campus by now, close to a small thicket of trees. "Galinda." He began, feeling slightly uncertain.

"Yes, dear?"

"Idon'tthinkweshouldseeeachotheranymore." It was cheesy, maybe, and cliché, but it might work.

"What?" Her brow furrowed. Maybe she hadn't understood. He _had_ spoken a little fast. Even so, he dove bravely on.

"It's not you, it's me." Clever, no? It had taken a quarter of an hour to come up with that. He forced himself to look into her eyes, in which he could see comprehension dawning. And she didn't look happy. "I'm not good enough for you," he babbled, unable to shut himself up. "You deserve someone…" _Need an adjective/description/something nice to keep her from crying/killing me! NOW! _"Better." He finished lamely. "I don't treat you as well as I should, and you should find someone who does."

"Well, I think you do!" She brightened, as though that settled things.

"Galinda…I'm sorry. I just can't." He scrunched his eyes shut, bracing for the inevitable sobs and please. What he wasn't ready for was what actually happened.

"Are you breaking _up_ with me?"

"…Yes."

She let out a loud shriek. "I am Galinda Upland! _**Of the upper Uplands! **_You can't _do _this to me!"

"It's not…you…"

But suddenly, she lunged, shrieking again, for his throat. Perfectly manicured nails scrabbled around, scratching his neck as they reached. She had just closed them around her target (Fiyero unable to move with shock) when…

"Well, isn't this entertaining." Fiyero wasn't sure whether Elphaba's arrival was the best or worst thing that could have happened.

Galinda froze in the act of strangling her new ex-boyfriend. "What are you doing here?" She snarled.

"Well, I _was _having a lovely stroll around campus. Interesting," she added, as though she had just noticed what was happening. "I wonder what your friends will think. Strangling someone is _so _unladylike, after all…"

Galinda's eyes widened in distress and she scoured the area for witnesses to her humiliation. "You'd better not tell anyone. I'm leaving." And she did.

Once the distraught blonde had disappeared, Fiyero turned to Elphaba. "Thank you."

She shrugged and turned back toward the building, but he caught her arm, turned her around, and, before he could think about what he was doing, pressed his lips to hers.

For a few blissful seconds, she responded. All too soon, though, she stiffened and pulled away, as though she'd only just become aware of what was happening. _Elphaba_, she berated herself furiously, _what is **wrong** with you? **You cannot do these things!** Particularly not with **him** of all people!_ "Elphaba?" Fiyero's concerned voice cut into her thoughts. "What's wrong?"

"I have to go," she blurted, and began to walk as quickly as she could.

"What? Wait!" He called, catching up with her with only a few loping strides. "Come on, Elphaba…"

"Leave, Fiyero. Leave me alone." The anguish in her voice struck a chord within him. He forced himself to stop, watched her disappear, and then paused to consider what had just happened, what it meant. (This week seemed to be full of realizations: 1) He was capable of making Elphaba laugh. 2) He really liked making Elphaba laugh. 3) He had actually _learned something_ in History. 4) He didn't have any feelings for Galinda.) And now there was a new one: instead of feelings for Galinda, he had feelings for Elphaba. Feelings that she most likely did not return. This last part was extremely distressing to Fiyero. How could she not have feelings for him? After all, if one listened to the giggling girls who roamed the hallway, he was the hottest hunk _ever_. Plus, he really liked her…wasn't this type of thing supposed to go both ways? But what could he do?

It hit him like a bolt of lightening. _Another Operation!_ They always seemed to work, after all (He decided to ignore that without Elphaba's help, Operation: BUwGU(aTNtMHC) would have been a complete disaster). What could he call this one?

A half hour later, Fiyero returned to his dorm, now thinking about all the ways to make Operation: Make the Green Girl Fall in Love with the Hottest Hunk Ever (MtdoubleGFiLwtdoubleHE) a resounding success. It would work. It just had to.

AN: TryDefyingGravity, it was you who suggested the whole strangling/thank-you-kiss thing, right? (There's another reason this chapter's for you!) And also, thanks to LostOzian for the Operation name. :)

Review, my loves! And I'm sorry for the long wait... :(


	10. No Roommate, No Problems

Disclaimer: Because that word isn't clear enough in itself.

Author's Note: Wow. You guys, honestly, I am BEYOND honored. First of all, millions of thanks to TryDefyingGravity for my nomination in Thespian-wolf's contest; secondly, to everyone who's actually **voted for me! **(Sniffles) I love you guys **so much**. The fact that you really think my story is good enough to be Best **anything** is...amazing. Mind blowing. Fabulous. I don't know how to express my gratitution:) And how do I thank you? By taking for-frigging-ever to update. I am so sorry. Forgive me and read the chapter? I hope it's worth it. Also, I don't know if they have mistletoe in Oz. If they don't, guess what? They do now:)

Elphaba was deeply gratified to find her dorm room empty. The last thing she felt like dealing with at the moment was her heartbroken blonde cream puff of a roommate. (Where Galinda was, Elphaba had no idea. Nor was she particularly worried about her.) She heaved an enormous sigh and poured some oil into her hands. As she massaged it into her face, she couldn't help but let her mind wander back to what had just happened. A kiss. Her first, in fact…with the guy who'd just dumped above-mentioned roommate. Oz, how screwed up was that? What kind of guy would _do_ something like that? She firmly resolved to forget about the incident…no matter how sincere he'd seemed. After all, she reminded herself, it wasn't as though she felt anything for him. Definitely not.

She changed into a nightgown and crawled under her covers. Now if only she could get to sleep.

LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Fiyero kicked off his shoes and padded over to his mirror. How in Oz he'd gotten lucky enough to get a roommate who was never actually _in_ the room (Had he even met the guy? He pondered this and came to the conclusion that they had never seen one another.) he had no idea. However, this was a truly fabulous development, as it was turning out. It left him free to pace around, carefully combing his hair, with no annoying distractions or questions. Unfortunately, all he could think about was kissing Elphaba. (And how amazing it had been and how much he really, really wanted to do it again…) While these were very pleasing thoughts, they weren't getting him any closer to a repeat performance.

About a half an hour later, he had come up with several possibilities. They included but were not limited to: 1) standing guard outside of Dillamond's room (Dr. Dillamond. Right. Show respect to the Animal and all that.) armed with mistletoe for when Elphaba showed up and 2) pretending to choke/drown/something else that would require possible mouth-to-mouth resuscitation with only the green girl present to administer such life-saving…life-savingness. There was also one that involved tripping her, but that one was proving a bit tricky to work out.

Knowing that he would forget these things unless drastic action was taken, Fiyero inhaled deeply. Then, seizing a piece of paper and a writing utensil…he…wrote the ideas down. Clearly, this was serious. The last time he'd written anything down had been at least a year ago. Seeing his words on paper, though, gave Fiyero a lovely, tingly feeling of accomplishment. Now all he had to do was choose a plan and put it into action.

GAAAAAAAASPPPPP! MOOOOOOOOOOREEEEEEEEEE LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSS!

When the sun rose the next morning it found a certain Miss Elphaba Thropp curled on a window seat, a book held in one limp hand. The yellow, pink and orange light hit the lids of her closed eyes, and she opened them slowly. Slightly disoriented, she gazed around the room. Galinda was exactly where she'd fallen asleep at some point the night before—buried under about three layers of blankets, with her pillow around her head. Then, Elphaba glanced blearily down at her hand as her book tumbled to the floor. At around 11:30 she'd given up on sleep, chalking it up to exhaustion, and decided to study for the History test coming up later in the week. (Not, of course, that she got much sleep on a regular basis anyway.) Apparently, her tiredness had caught up to her. She rubbed her face briskly and clamored off of the window seat. She wobbled a bit, her legs numb from the fact that they'd been curled under her for the past six or seven hours (she hadn't moved since she'd started studying last night), and the got changed.

When she exited the room about five minutes later, laden with books, she decided she wanted to take a walk. So she did so, wandering around the courtyard with no real destination in mind, until it occurred to her. This was the place. Where she was at that exact moment. The place of the kiss. The completely insignificant, didn't-mean-a-thing-and-never-would kiss. Breakfast time, she decided abruptly. Fruit. Yes, definitely. Raspberries and blueberries…maybe a peach or a plum. Being friends with the Zebra cooks, she was able to gain entrance to the kitchens despite the early hour, to obtain her breakfast. She accepted it, made idle chitchat with the cooks, and then took her breakfast outside to eat it under a tree that was far, far from the edge of the courtyard where…it…had happened. Fortunately, she realized suddenly, the likelihood of anyone being awake and deciding to hang out outside for an hour before they could eat was not very high. Especially not Fiyero. He probably wasn't even up yet. He could sleep all day for all she cared.

LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE (AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIN)

By behaving in this manner all day, she was able to avoid Fiyero until History. Unfortunately for her, he had himself parked directly in front of the door when she showed up. "You're in my way." She snarled, as maliciously as possible. It wasn't her fault, really. It was all him. Why did he have to go and be so…frustrating? And why, why, _why_ were his eyes so darn _blue?_

"Sorry." He grinned, exposing a dimple and making it very clear that he didn't mean it at all.

"Move."

"Wait, hold on. What's that?" He was pointing up.

"What?" Her eyes narrowed suspiciously.

"_That_." She gazed up, and her eyes locked on a little green plant, stuck rather haphazardly on the doorframe. _**Oh, no**_.

"I haven't the slightest idea." Somehow she managed to push her way past him and into the room before he had a chance to respond. Instantly, she made a beeline for the back of the room and sat as far away from the door as she could.

HEYYYYYYYY LOOOOOOOOOOOK ANOOOOOOOTHEEEEEEEER LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Fiyero could have bashed his head against the wall. Did she have _no idea_ how difficult it had been for him to do that? Every female who'd seen what was over the door (and who was under it) had practically sprinted at him. He'd had to quickly dart away and pretend he'd seen something positively intriguing. It had been very stressful. And now she hadn't even had the decency to let the plan work! He ripped the mistletoe down and walked into the room. Maybe if he had time to talk to her before class started, he'd have time to convince her that she passionately loved him.

AN: Sorry if the ending disappoints. Review for a lovely, grateful authoress who probably doesn't even deserve it?


	11. DOUBLE FEATURE!

AN: I am SO SORRY, you do not even KNOW! OMO, you guys, I completely understand if you never review again. Gazillions of thanks to those of you who voted "Notes" best romance, by the way!! (Glomps lovely voters) It's a double chappie for you, if that makes up for it in any way, shape or form!

Full Chapter Title: In Which Operation PtbCtdoubleGFtNtSM,tdoubleHE is Introduced, Nessa's Love Life Starts Oddly Mirroring Her Sister's...Sort of...and Note-Passing Becomes a Kind of Epidemic

"Elphaba?" Fiyero tried hopefully.

Her only response was to dig determinedly through her bag for the pen she could feel pressing against her finger.

"Elllllllllphabaaaaaaaa?" He pouted. She was making such a big deal. If she'd just kissed him under the frickin' mistletoe like she was supposed to (that _had_ been the plan, after all), things would be just about perfect right now.

She slammed her pen to the desk with unnecessary force dropped her bag, still giving no sign that she had heard him.

"Elphiiiiiiiie…" This had the desired effect of getting her to look at him, but the murderous look in her eyes was not what he called a good sign. He tried an innocent grin, and she made a disgusted sound and half-rose from her seat as if she was about to move. Unfortunately, she had wasted too much time ignoring him, and the classroom was now full.

"Yes, Miss Elphaba?" Dr. Dillamond inquired, looking slightly confused. Her eyes widened as she realized her mistake. Slightly flustered, she sat back down.

"Nothing, sir. I'm sorry." Fiyero half wished she would glare at him again. At least then he'd get to see those stunning eyes. He heard Galinda snickering to Pfannee and Shen Shen and sunk a little lower in his seat. She'd been fixing him with her won version of the death glare every time he passed her and then immersing herself in loud, I-so-obviously-could-not-care-less-about-Fiyero-Tiggular conversation with her friends when he looked at her. Already, rumors were flying about the couple's split, and it hadn't even been twenty-four hours yet! There was one that involved Galinda walking in on Fiyero and some random chick, one that involved Galinda walking in on Fiyero and his roommate (This one was the one Fiyero took issue with. He was Fiyero frickin' Tiggular—were the people at this school forgetting about the stories they had heard/told/made up when he first got to Shiz? They'd all involved girls…and a certain not-doing-work thing, but that was totally not the point. Also, Fiyero didn't have the slightest clue what his roomie looked like. He could have been an Ozian Falcon model and there would _still _never be anything there.)…Fiyero blinked. He'd gotten a teeny bit distracted, apparently. Also, everyone was staring at him. Oz, had he done that thing where he said his thoughts out loud again? It would be just his luck…he thought he'd outgrown that charming little habit.

"Um, hi?" he offered lamely. Elphaba made another noise in the back of her throat—was this her new thing?—and he shot her a desperate "help me!" look. Unfortunately, she was the only one not looking at him. Dr. Dillamond gave a despairing sigh.

"Could you at least try paying attention, Mr. Tiggular? Yes, Miss Thropp, some help if you will."

"Well, when Ozma the Mendacious took the throne, she developed a nasty habit of lying to her subjects in order to make them trust her. She acted like their friend and then used their money to buy herself expensive gifts." Fiyero blinked. Elphaba definitely sounded angry. At whom? At him? But what, exactly, had he done? He ripped the bottom part of his paper and scrawled, **Are you mad at me? **and lightly tossed it onto her desk. She, of course, ignored the paper.

"Psst," he hissed loudly, attempting to get her attention. "Psst, Elphaba." Nothing. "ELphaba!"

She whipped around so fast that her braid whacked her in the face. "What?" she mouthed furiously.

He gestured to her desk with raised eyebrows. She rolled her eyes, but seized the paper. _**What are you talking about? Have you checked your family's medical history for paranoia? I seem to recall telling you to do that a while back.**_ She shoved it back over, annoyed.

**But you seem mad. Can we study tonight, though?**

_**Ah, wow, is that the Great and Mighty Fiyero Tiggular asking to do such a humble thing as study?**_ She read it over and contemplated crossing it out and starting over, but she gave him the note before she could change her mind. After all, it would be evidence that the…thing…that happened didn't mean anything. This note was the perfect way to stop dwelling on it. Not that she _was _dwelling on it…and none of it made any sense.

**Hey, you're definitely mad. What did I even do? **He actually felt hurt.

_**If you don't know**_ Elphaba crossed this out. She could hardly be honest with him if she didn't even know what the truth was. **_Library at eight._** She wrote finally, and handed it back.

He blinked. **Um. Alright.**

_**Great. Now if you don't mind, I'll go back to paying attention so that I can actually pass this class.**_

**Alright, alright.**

She had apparently reached the end of her rope, because she ignored the paper completely for the rest of the class.

Her leg bounced compulsively under the table as she fought to ignore the piece of paper sitting forlornly on her desk. It couldn't possibly say anything important, right? The whole conversation had been a waste of time. Right.

Fiyero groaned to himself. Why'd she have to go and be so stubborn? Now he'd actually have to figure out Plan B, AKA Operation: Pretend to be Choking So the Green Girl Feels the Need to Save Me, the Hottest Hunk Ever (Operation: PtbCStdoubleGFtNtSm,tdoubleHE).

Nessarose Thropp had been watching this go on for days, and she'd figured out Fiyero's motive—she always _had_ been much better at that stuff than Elphaba. She also knew her sister a whole heck of a lot better than the Prince, and had a feeling that whatever he was planning wouldn't work well in his quest for her sister's heart. Still, the note thing was cute. Nessa liked cute. She needed some cute in her life. After all, cute was…cute. What kind of person (excluding her dear sister) didn't like cute? Determinedly, she pulled out a piece of paper and wrote in her dainty cursive: _Good morning, Master Boq! How are you today? _She'd taken to sitting closer to the Munchkin boy, insisting to Elphaba that she needed to start standing on her own two feet—so to speak—and couldn't be forever under her sister's wing. Thus, it was easy to put the note on Boq's desk.

He blinked confusedly at the paper, which Nessa had carefully folded into a little heart, before apprehensively unfolding it. What could she need? His brow furrowed as he read it over. Should he respond? He really did need to pay attention. But he made the mistake of looking over at her first, and she smiled shyly. GAH, now he had to answer because she'd seen him open it. Why? Why?

**Quite alright, Miss Nessarose. And yourself?** Well, it was an obligation! He began to re-fold the note, but then thought better of it, creasing it only once before returning it to her.

Nessa smiled to herself. She'd watched him read her note, and he'd nearly folded it back into the heart. That _had_ to mean something. Definitely. After all, he probably didn't want to be seen passing a heart-shaped note. That was fine. Understandable, even.

_I'm doing very well. _But suddenly, she could think of nothing to say. Finally she came up with the ever original, _Are you ready for this test?_

Boq tried hard not to groan. He liked Nessa, he truly did, but it was painfully obvious that friendship wasn't what was on the young girl's mind. **Not really, **he wrote finally, **are you?**

Nessa's smile grew as, unbeknownst to anyone in the room, she made the situation even more eerily like Elphaba's. _Do you want to study with me?_ _We can help each other. _

Boq, feeling distinctly uncomfortable now, scribbled the first excuse that came to mind. **I would, Miss Nessarose, only I don't study well with other people and I really need to do well on this test.**

Her face fell. This wasn't supposed to happen. They were supposed to study together, upon which time Boq would realize that he loved her and needed her desperately. _Oh. That's all right. Maybe_ Annoyed, she crossed out the word. There was no maybe. He'd just used an excuse that she couldn't counter. Painstakingly, she refolded the heart. She couldn't help it. Because she wouldn't give up.

Boq sighed. He felt bad for turning Nessa down, especially since she was clearly disappointed. Still, he didn't want to lead her on or anything. That would be really unfair…especially since his heart belonged to Galinda. He caught sight of the heart-shaped paper on the side of his desk and his eyes lit up in a very oddly timed, way-too-coincidental-to-actually-happen-in-real-life realization. Notes! That was cute, right? Fi_yero_ had probably never passed notes to Galinda. Struck by his own sheer genius, he proceeded to forget about paying attention to Dr. Dillamond and begin to plan out his strategy.

Full Bonus Chapter Title: GAH, Libraries, Choking and Lies to Oneself

Elphaba was not in the mood for this crap. That odd twittery feeling in her stomach was…some…kind of…indigestion. Yeah. Sure. She re-braided her hair—it had gotten rather mussed throughout the course of the day and took a second glance in the mirror. She was only…making sure…she didn't, uh, have…food on her face. Right. Annoyed with herself, she shouldered her bag and marched out of the room without looking back.

Fiyero tossed the apple he had gotten from the dining hall into the air repeatedly, his excitement building. For a guy who hadn't really thought about anything since he was about ten, he was pretty frickin' smart. This plan was foolproof. He grinned, grabbed the singular sheet of paper that had stuff written on it (which was just lying on the floor) and left the room.

When he reached the library (dodging some friends who were bugging him about sneaking out to go to a bar by inventing a not-entirely-false story about needing to meet up with someone very important and, "oh-crap-look-at-that-I'm-a-half-hour-late"—which he wasn't—that was the only false bit) Elphaba was already there. (If Fiyero had been in the habit of using the brain that he actually did possess, he would have noticed that the previous sentence-realization he had just had was a horrendous run-on. English teachers all over the world were screaming bloody murder.) Unfazed, however, he strolled nonchalantly up to the table. "Hey," he said, casually sliding into the seat beside her and flashing his best "Why Yes, I Am Quite Sexy, Thank You Very Much" smile at her.

"Good evening," she replied stiffly, seeming to take no notice of his facial expression. (Hers was more of an "I Would Rather Gouge Myself In The Heart With A Toothpick Than Deal With You Right Now" type thing, but then again…wait, no, there was no then again. Unless you counted the fact that that wasn't really how Elphaba felt, no matter how many times she tried to tell herself that it was.)

Fiyero blinked confusedly. "Tell me why you're so mad," he pleaded, all thoughts of seduction flying out the window. He just wanted her to like him again, as childish as that was.

She laughed humorlessly. "Why do you care what I think of you? And besides, paranoia, as I have told you in the past, really does not become you."

"All right, all right," he sighed, surrendering.

As she turned a page, searching for a suitable question, he took the first bite of apple, grinning to himself. She flipped another page. "This is all the information about the Vinkus royal family. You'll be just fine there. It's the Ozmas and their history you have to worry about."

Fiyero shrugged his assent as he bit into the apple again.

"All right," sighed Elphaba, having located a decent question at last. "How did Ozma the Mendacious come to be called that?"

Fiyero started and swallowed his apple chunk whole, resulting in a slight cough. He knew that one! Okay, so he knew that one because he'd taken to listening to Elphaba talk during class, if only because he liked hearing her voice. "She lied to her people to get her money and then used it to buy herself expensive gifts."

Elphaba looked mildly surprised. "It appears you do occasionally pay attention to what other people say, Master Fiyero. Congratulations. How did she die?"

He blinked. Had she answered that question in class before? "Ahhh…"

She raised her eyebrows, but didn't speak.

_Okay,_ Fiyero coached himself silently, _you can do this._ "Sheeeeeeeee….was…murdered?"

"Lucky guess, then. How?"

_Darn. _"Um. Her people realized they were being robbed andddd…stormed the…place where she lived. And she was killed by the giant mob?"

"Yes." Elphaba snorted. "You've got quite a knack for guesses, haven't you?"

He shrugged. "Nah, I remembered it." _Whew. Pulled that out of my butt._

"Right. You never did get the order of the Ozmas."

_Aw, come on._ "Ummm…Mendacious…Bilious…Very Beloved…"

"Annnd you're wrong." Elphaba cut him off sharply. "We've been over this about a thousand times in class, it's the Mendacious, the Warrior, the Librarian, the Scarcely Beloved, the Bilious, and Tippertarius."

"How am I supposed to remember that?"

"Well, I would suggest an acronym, but I doubt you know what that means."

"You could teach me." He suggested, raising his eyebrows.

She sighed. "Is it even going to sink in, or is it just going to be a waste of my evening?"

"I don't know," he replied truthfully, "but we could try it."

She took a deep breath. "All right. You make up a phrase where each word starts with the letter of the thing it represents. So your phrase would be something like, My Word, Lions Seem Big But Tame. That one doesn't make much sense, but it's the first thing that came to mind."

"My Word, Lions Seem Big But Tame…" he repeated slowly.

"Right. Can you remember what that stands for?"

She didn't even sound condescending anymore. This was a good sign! "Umm…Mendacious…Wo—Warrior…Listen—"

She shook her head.

"Li…brarian…Seem. Seem is…Scary?"

"Close. You forgot a few letters." For some reason, Elphaba didn't really mind coaching Fiyero through this. Maybe because he really seemed to be trying.

"Scarcely Beloved! And there's another two Bs…"

"No. Only one, the first B was the Beloved."

"Oh, right, right…Big But Tame…Bilious, Tippertacious?"

"Tippertarius," she corrected, but bestowed him with a rare, slight smile and allowed a "not bad."

He beamed. It was time. Dramatically, he took a huge bite of apple, swallowed, and began to cough. She would think it was caught in his throat, no doubt.

She tilted her head. "When you're finished, feel free to tell me when Ozma the Librarian's book fetish started."

He continued coughing, attempting to convey with his eyes that he couldn't breathe. He stopped coughing suddenly and pretended to keel forward onto the table. Unfortunately, he'd never been much of an actor, and he'd never been able to hold his breath for long periods of time.

"I can see you breathing." She sounded mad again.

_Curse you, Operation PtbCStdoubleGFtNtSm,tdoubleHE! _

"You know, if you were tired of studying, you could just tell me," she snapped, starting to gather her things.

He sat straight up immediately planning on trying to make her stay, and gave himself a head rush. While he wobbled woozily, attempting to regain control of motor functions, she spotted his lone sheet of paper. "Odd, I don't know how that got over there…" And then she grabbed it and went to put it with the rest of her papers. Something made her look again, though, and her face grew livid. "What is _this_, Fiyero? 'List of Ways to Make the Green Girl Fall in Love with Me, the Hottest Hunk Ever?' Is this all a game to you? Are you that _sick_?"

AN2: You lovely readers have a choice in where this fic goes from here! The first one is a poll in my profile, where you can vote for a second pairing of Bessa, Gloq, either or neither. The SECOND one is what Fiyero does in this situation.

Do you want him to:

A. Come clean and explain the real meaning of the list

or

B. Make up some kind of excuse?

I leave Fiyero's fate in your fabulous, wonderful hands!


	12. ANOTHER ONE!

AN: I'M SO SORRY! Here, look, it's really long...kind of! It's not edited, do forgive any errors please, as I just wanted to get it up for you wonderous folks. Wicked never was, never will be mine.

"No!" Fiyero leapt to his feet, resulting in yet another head rush and causing him to clutch at the table while he waited for the pretty, colored dots exploding in front of his eyes to disappear. "Elphaba, wait!"

She spun around to glare at him and he shrank back a little. "I knew all along that you were a self-absorbed playboy, but I had no _idea_ you would stoop this low just because you were _bored_!"

"That's not it at all. Elphaba, _stop_." He hurried after her, then reached out and grasped her arm.

"Get off me," she spat, yanking herself free and continuing toward the door.

"Listen…" he pleaded, half-running after her. "Elphaba…I really care about you."

She stopped for a split second, gave a maniacal kind of laugh, shook her head and continued on her way.

"What do I have to do to make you listen? Don't you care for me at all?" He demanded, desperate.

A brief pause, and then…"No."

"I…" He stopped short as her words sunk in. A dagger to the chest couldn't have been more painful. She disappeared around a corner, leaving him frozen in shock. By the time he had shaken it off she was long gone. A full two minutes later, he snapped back into himself and dashed after her. Then it occurred to him that he had no idea where she would go. He halted. _Crap_.

And then, as luck would have it, he spotted Boq, which reminded him of Nessa (for reasons that he couldn't quite figure out). And, hey, if anyone knew Elphie…phaba…whatever…it was Nessa. Right? Right. "Hey, Boq!" he called, hurrying forward. The boys weren't close, but they did have the occasional conversation. And since Nessa had gone to the Ozdust with Boq, he might know where Fiyero could find her.

"Hey." The Munchkin boy waited for Fiyero to catch up, looking mystified.

Fiyero smiled uncertainly. "I really need to talk to Nessa. Do you know where I can find her?"

Boq blinked. "No, actually. What do you need her for?"

"Gotta ask her something. It's important." He ran his fingers anxiously through his hair. "You have no idea where she is, then?"

Boq thought a moment. "Math, I think."

"Kaythanks," Fiyero blurted at top speed, "gottagoseeyoulater!" And then he sprinted for the math room, only to stand there and make like a statue until the class ended so that he wouldn't get in trouble for skipping his own class. The second Nessa wheeled out, he made his move. "Nessa! Ness-ssa!"" He hurried forward. "Can I talk to you for, like, five minutes?"

She wheeled closer, tilting her head. "Sure. Something wrong?" (For the two had barely exchanged anything more than polite pleasantries in the past.) She paused, and a look of understanding washed over her face. "Is this about Elphaba?"

"Um. Yes. How did you know?" He asked, slightly freaked out. _Oh, my Oz, Nessa is a psychic!_

"Because," she replied with a patient sigh, "she's obviously furious with you for something, and you seem to have no idea why."

"I do know why, only it's not actually a good reason," he argued. "Does she ever talk about me?"

Nessa gave him an _oh, please_ type of stare. "Do you have any idea who we're talking about right now?" Without waiting for a response, she steamrolled on. "I figured she misunderstood something. Here, I don't have a class now, if you want my help dealing with her."

He let out a huge breath of relief. "Yes, please."

"Okay." They decided that her room was the best place for this meeting, due to the fact that no one ever visited her but Elphaba, and the girl had never skipped class in her life. "Here's the thing about Elphaba," Nessa began. "For a ridiculously smart girl, she's actually really stupid when it comes to this kind of thing." She wheeled over to her mirror and fussed with her hair, unconcerned.

"So then what can I do?" Fiyero asked. "I kind of figured kissing her would do it, but I guess not?"

Nessa's jaw dropped. "You _kissed _her?" She groaned and stared at the ceiling. "Fabala, you dense, clueless _fool_!" A deep, cleansing sigh. "Okay, so what did you do to irritate her?"

He paused. "Well, see, I really like her. Possibly love her, actually. But she was being…"

"Stubbornly Elphaba." Nessa nodded understandingly. "Continue."

He flushed deeply. "So I came up with all these plans, and I think she was kind of starting to maybe, possibly feel the same way about me…and…Iwantedtokissher, but I didn't think she'd be interested…soIwrotedownabunchofideas…and accidentally brought the list when I went to study with her."

Nessa looked partly amused, partly horrified (once she had decoded Fiyero's high-speed ramblings). "Oh, sweet Oz, she saw it, didn't she?" His bleak, pained stare was all the confirmation she needed. "She went off," Nessa predicted. Another, equally bleak, pained nod. Nessa pondered this, then said, in the manner of a person entertaining a very slim hope as to the avoidance of a minor tragedy, "and I suppose she didn't listen when you tried to explain what it actually was?"

"Of course she didn't," he sighed, "and then she…said some things."

Nessa grimaced. "Like what? I'll translate from Angry Elphaba to What Elphaba is Actually Saying. Because she tends to…make some things up sometimes, in the interest of self-preservation."

"She was pretty clear, Nessa," he replied hopelessly. " I don't think I need a translation."

"I know for a fact that you're wrong," Nessa informed him calmly. "She cares about you, which is blatantly obvious due to the fact that she would even help you study. She doesn't do that stuff."

"Even if, say, the person she was helping to study annoyed her until she agreed to help him? 'Coz…yeah."

"Trust me, Fiyero. My sister is master of antisocial…ness. Studying with people who aren't me goes completely against her deeply ingrained personality traits. And you see how stubborn she is. Even if she didn't realize it, or still doesn't, she _wanted _to help you. And that definitely means something."

"Oh. Cool." Fiyero grinned, elated, until her remembered that he had blown this to smithereens. "But how do I fix this, though?"

Nessa thought for a moment. "How did all of this start? I'm talking about the very, very beginning." She knew, of course, because she was incredibly observant, but it would freak him out if she told him that.

"Notes," he replied. "I was bored, and I passed her a note."

"So write her another note. Apologize. Tell her there's a perfectly reasonable explanation for your list if she would only stop being so stupid for _two seconds_ and realize how lucky she is that the guy that she cares about is actually interested!" An awkward silence while Nessa controlled herself, taking in deep gulps of air. "Sorry, I'm having some…romance issues…myself. Wait, don't _write _all that!" For Fiyero had whipped out a piece of paper and pen the second Nessa had begun to talk, and had been writing down everything she'd been saying.

"Right." Painstakingly, he crossed out the majority of the note. "How's this sound? Elphie, --"

"No." Nessa cut him off immediately. "She will murder you if you call her that."

"True. 'Kay. Wait, so, what exactly am I saying? I'm just apologizing."

"And telling her that you need to talk to her. Because an apology is not going to suffice, especially not a written one."

"Oh. Right." He crossed something else out. "But what if she ignores it? Oh, and wait, what if I throw something in there about appearances being deceiving? Would that, like, convince her, since she's had issues with that?"

Nessa winced. "I'm not quite sure…it may actually just end up backfiring and getting her even angrier. Oh, and she won't ignore it. She's frustratingly stubborn, but she has this masochistic impulse that tells her that everyone will always disappoint her, and she must always see exactly how much."

"But I don't want to disappoint her."

"I _know_ that." Nessa's voice was tinged with exasperation. "But it's what she expects anyway. She'll probably try to bait you into it."

"Why?"

"Why, what?"

"Why does she expect people to disappoint her?" he clarified, almost childishly.

"I don't…" Nessa sighed. "It's what she's used to, I guess. Don't ask me anything else, and _don't_ mention that, she'll know you got it from me, and she'll kill me."

"But…" Nessa's eyes flashed dangerously, quelling Fiyero's Quest for Information at once. "'Kay, never mind." He sighed. "Hey, so should we have a Plan B?"

"Plan B is only necessary if Plan A doesn't work, and we'll figure it out then. Alright?"

He nodded. "Can we call this something more interesting than Plan A? Like…Operation: Somehow Write a Really Good Note So That Elphaba Isn't Mad at Me Anymore? We can call it Operation: SWaRGNSTEIMaMA for short."

"Um. Sure. We can call it whatever you want." Nessa rolled her eyes. "Good luck…you'll need it." She finished so ominously that Fiyero half expected to hear a loud crack of thunder.

Instead, he exclaimed, "Thanks!", bent down, and kissed her on the cheek before bounding from the room, leaving her astonished.

HEY LOOK! A LIIIIIIIIIIINE! THE LINES MISSED YOUUUUUUUUUU!!

The following day, unfortunately, was Dillamond's—_Dr. Dillamond, dammit_! Fiyero corrected himself for the umpteenth time—test. He sighed. How in the name of all things verdigrisian (that was a cool word, he decided, even though he was fairly sure it hadn't existed until he thought it) was he supposed to concentrate on a test when Elphaba was harboring slanderously (if that was the right word. Fiyero was attempting to expand his rather limited vocabulary) horrible delusions about his opinion of her? Also, his brain was exhausted from his use of so many polysyllabic words and now he wasn't entirely sure he could remember his own mother's name. But maybe if he passed, she'd realize that…wait, no. Then it would seem like he'd been using her for a passing grade. Maybe he could take her out to celebrate, in plain view of everyone so that she would know that he wasn't, like, ashamed of her. Or something. Doubtless Avaric would never let him hear the end of it, but who really cared? It wasn't like Avaric ever thought with his brain, anyway.

Pleased with his plan, which he had christened Operation: Pass the Test and Then Take the Green Girl on a Date to Show My Extreme Gratitution, (PdoubleTatripleTdoubleGoaDtSMEG), Fiyero perched on the edge of his bed and struggled to remember the anagram (or was it acronym?) that Elphaba had taught him the night before. My Word, Lions Seem Big But Tame. Right? He pictured her in his mind's eye, double-checking his wording, and smiled happily when the words matched. He scribbled it on his hand and left the room with no further ado.

He smiled at her when he entered the room, but she didn't even look at him. What was worse, she'd insulated herself from him, sitting close to a window, next to her sister in the front row. His smile flipped, standing on its head, and he groaned, sinking unenthusiastically into a seat in the far back corner of the room. The test papers, he noted bleakly, were already on the desks. "You may begin," Dr. Dillamond bleated in his sandpapery voice, cutting into Fiyero's thoughts. Was it disrespectful to refer to a Goat's voice as bleating and sandpapery? Fiyero pondered this as he flipped over his paper.

Why was Ozma the Mendacious referred to as such?

He blinked. Good, sweet Lurline and all the beautiful green things up above, he knew this one! Elphaba had answered it just yesterday in class. He wrote down what she'd said, and then, before he could stop himself, had added, **But what if she wasn't lying? What if she totally meant everything she'd said, but people misunderstood and thought she didn't like them, when really she loved them and hadn't really meant to steal their stuff? **It didn't matter that this was utterly ridiculous, or that the answer written above it sounded a whole lot smarter than the random, emotional burst of writing he'd scribbled beneath it. The tight, painful feeling in his chest dissipated slightly, and he was able to move on. He finished with five minutes to spare, got up and handed his paper to Dr. Dillamond, surreptitiously placing a small square of paper on Elphaba's desk as he headed back to his own.

She wanted to ignore it, she really did. And she would have, only Nessa had seen the whole thing while she avoided answering the questions on the test that she couldn't figure out. What was worse, Nessa was now whispering (for she knew her _sister_, if not the test material, quite well) that she would not write another letter until Elphaba opened that note. Heaving an annoyed sigh but unable to allow her sister to fail just because of this stupid Fiyero thing, Elphaba opened that note.

**Elphie Sorry, Elphaba, I mean, I'm really, truly sorry. I never meant to hurt your feelings, and I really care about you. I promise, it's not what you think. Give me one more chance…appearances can be deceiving. Fiyero.**

His heart thudded painfully as he watched her read his carefully pondered (with Nessa's help, naturally) note. She stared at it. Stared some more. Stared so ridiculously long that Fiyero was absolutely certain that she wasn't really reading it, at least not anymore. She was a fast reader, and it was a pretty short note. What would she say? He suddenly regretted that he'd left the 'Elphie' visible, and that he'd taken the chance in writing about deceiving appearances. But he could always…blame Nessa. Right? (Even though Nessa had 'strongly cautioned' him against saying it, because she had a feeling it would get her sister all defensive and whatnot?)

Elphaba was astonished. She read the note. Read it again. A third time. Then she turned to Nessa. "What?" She blurted in a rather out of character fashion, for her sister was watching her intently. "Nessie, finish your test, we can talk later."

Nessa's eyes narrowed as an idea occurred to her. "Only if you forgive him."

"Nessa, please. Just take your—wait. What are you talking about? Forgive who?" Elphaba demanded, grateful that she'd caught herself.

"Fiyero. At least give him a chance."

Nessa…I don't know what you're talking about. And even if there was something going on between us—which there _isn't_, thank Lurline—it wouldn't be any of your concern." Elphaba protested.

Nessa held up her hands. "Fine. But you should still talk to him, even if there's nothing going on. And Father won't be pleased if I fail."

Her implications nailed Elphaba right in the chest. "Alright," she conceded, nodding once, "I'll talk to him. For whatever strange reason you want me to…and only if you finish your test. Now."

Nessa beamed. If Fiyero and Elphaba got together, it was solid proof that Note-Wooing worked, and Lurline knew that Elphaba was more stubborn than Boq could _ever_ be. Okay, so maybe she'd had to push her sister kind of hard, but perhaps if Elphaba was in the throes of love, she'd be happier, and possibly do some pushing of her own so that her poor, dear, crippled sister could have the same happiness, particularly when she took into consideration that her poor, dear, crippled sister had been the one to push Elphaba into said throes of love. Feeling far, far better about Boq's kind-of-maybe rejection to her note, Nessa returned to her test.

Elphaba had no _idea_ what to think. Would he really go this far for some stupid prank? She'd promised Nessa she'd give him a chance, and she knew that no matter how much Nessa could seem like the poor, dear, crippled sister when it suited her, the girl could be ridiculously persistent. Downright annoying, actually. Elphaba briefly wondered if Nessa really would have failed the test just because of Fiyero's note. She shot a glance at her sister, who still held the remnants of steely coldness buried under several layers of near-psychotic happiness, all lodged within normally warm eyes (years of dealing with the girl had left Elphaba an excellent ability to read her sister's eye-expressed emotions even as her face was perfectly tranquil) and immediately had her answer. Nessa would absolutely fail the test just because of Fiyero's (probably meaningless) note. Truth be told, Elphaba wondered if her sister had some kind of ulterior motive. Because honestly, that reaction was Just Not Normal. _But then again, who am I to talk of normalcy? _Annoyed with her own traitorous thoughts, Elphaba crammed Fiyero's note to the bottom of her bag. Once the bell rang, they'd get this stupid thing sorted out once and for all.

Unfortunately, once the bell rang, Fiyero sprinted from the room. Elphaba shot her sister a triumphant guess-I-can't-talk-to-him-now smirk, grabbed her stuff and swept from the room.


	13. There is a Convenient Plot Twist

Author's Note: I cannot apologize enough. Really, I don't know what excuse I could possibly use that would merit such a ridiculous amount of time between updates. Please forgive and read? And as you know, Wicked's not mine.

Fiyero sighed. He'd wanted to talk to Elphaba immediately after class, but…well, after all, Nessa had warned him to give her a few days to calm down and think everything through. (Because, as all evidence clearly showed, an angry Elphaba was a terrifying/very-capable-of-destroying-your-entire-week-in-one-word Elphaba.) Besides, Boq was standing beside him, presumably having dashed after him at the end of class, considering the fact that he'd been all the way across the room, and was saying something that was quite possibly important. "Excuse me…Fiyero," he panted, rather bashfully.

Fiyero blinked himself back to the present. "Hey. Sorry, I was…thinking. What's up?"

"I need help." Boq blurted. "And I figured since…" He was too polite to do anything more than let the 'you kind of owe me for the whole finding-Nessa thing' hang in the air. So instead, he stood there in silence, looking at the Winkie with wide, hopeful eyes.

Fiyero wasn't even going to try to figure out what Boq was trying to say, but he guessed he kind of owed the Munchkin for the whole finding-Nessa thing, because that had turned out to be incredibly valuable/helpful (probably), so… "What with?"

"Well, see…" Awkward, awkward. Boq internally cursed himself for forgetting that Galinda had been dating Fiyero, like, three days ago. But maybe if he didn't mention names, he'd be alright. "Um…the other day, Nessa wrote me a note and I figured…maybe if I wrote this other girl that I kind of like some notes…she would get to like me back." He blushed a violent red. "Right? Does that…work?"

Fiyero blinked. "Is that why Nessa wrote to you?" He actually wasn't sure why he thought that, but he kind of thought maybe the younger Thropp had some kind of feelings for Boq. And she _did_ seem to always sit near him in class, and…well, it just made sense. But then again, he had no idea what the Thropps really liked, apparently, so he was probably dead wrong.

Boq blinked. "I don't know," he admitted. "I sometimes think that maybe she might like me. Actually, the note was folded into the shape of a heart, so…probably? But maybe that's just the way she folds her notes, you know? But I don't feel…I mean, I don't…I like this other girl."

Fiyero sighed. Boq was really quite hopelessly clueless. "You know, you should give Nessa a chance. She's pretty great."

"But wouldn't that be leading her on?"

Fiyero's head was beginning to ache. "Not really. I'm not telling you to lead her on. You wouldn't be asking her out or kissing her or anything." Boq blanched at the word 'kiss', and Fiyero rolled his eyes. "Look. I'm just telling you to pay more attention to her, and talk to her a little more. And maybe you should try to stop thinking about this 'other girl.' Unless you're sure she likes you back." It was painfully obvious that Boq was still hung up on Galinda, and Fiyero was absolutely certain that Nessa was the better match. Because the fact was, Galinda would never be interested in the lovestruck Munchkin. Ever. She wasn't being cruel (not intentionally, at least), but it was a statement of fact. Galinda wanted a good-looking, filthy rich charmer, and Boq just didn't fit the description.

Boq, meanwhile, was shaking his head. "I don't think she really knows who I am," he replied sorrowfully.

"Well, then, writing love notes won't help. Trust me."

Boq exhaled in disappointment. "But how do you know? You don't know who she is."

Fiyero raised an eyebrow. "Galinda," he replied flatly, "you're not the only one. And trust me, it's useless. No offense." He glanced around. "Look, I gotta go. Think about it, okay?" And he hurried away, leaving Boq staring bewilderedly after him.

LiIiIiIiiIIiiNeEeEEeEeeE!!one!1!

Elphaba was really, really confused. "Nessie?" she called, knocking on her sister's door. "Are you in here?"

"Yes." The door swung open, and there Nessa sat, looking deeply smug. "Hi, Fabala. Did you talk to him?" Elphaba's eyes narrowed.

"Why do you think that I _need _to talk to him?" she demanded.

Nessa suddenly looked disparaging. "You _are _joking, right? It's so painfully obvious that nothing's even close to platonic between the two of you." As Elphaba gaped at her, Nessa wheeled herself into the room to allow her sister to enter, Elphaba following her numbly. "He's very hurt that you're blowing him off, Elphie. That's not nice, you know."

"How do you _know_ any of this?" Elphaba shrieked.

"Well, he came to _talk_ to me, of course, because he knew you'd freak out on him and tune out everything he said." She raised her eyebrows challengingly.

Elphaba blinked. "But…what…Nessa, did he tell you what he _did?"_

Nessa groaned. "Elphie, dear, of _course_ he did. He didn't mean it the way it seemed."

"You have him, then," Elphaba snapped. "There's no other way it can be taken."

"Of course there is!" Nessa threw her arms up in the air angrily. "But obviously _I _can't tell you what it is, that's his business. Just _talk _to him, for the love of Lurline!"

Elphaba grimaced. "You are completely insufferable." Nessa smirked. "Fine!" spat the elder Thropp. "I'm going now, then." And she left, despite having no intention of actually finding Fiyero.

Unfortunately, she bumped right into Madame Morrible. "Assembly, Miss Thropp," she trumpeted, straightening her shoulders and staring regally down at Elphaba. "Do go fetch your sister."

Elphaba pulled a face at Morrible's retreating back and returned to her sister's room. "Nessie, there's an assembly."

At that precise moment, Morrible seemed to realize that it would be much more prudent to make her announcement over the intercom than to wander the halls, fetching each and every student by hand. "Students of Shiz!" she thundered impressively, "There will be an assembly in the main hall in fifteen minutes!" (For some reason, she was under the deluded impression that the intercom would pick up her voice only if she bellowed in its general direction. A pity for the ears of the student body, but apparently nothing could be done about it.)

"Shall we head over, then?" Elphaba suggested. Nessa nodded eagerly, sensing opportunity that came within the first five seconds of the sisters' entrance to the hall.

"C'mon, Fabala," she ordered, spotting Fiyero and Avaric and zipping toward them at once.

"Nessa…" Elphaba protested, jogging after her.

Fiyero's face lit up as he spotted them, and he shot Nessa a questioning glance, to which she nodded somberly. "Elphaba. Can we talk for a sec?" Avaric's jaw dropped and he started to speak, but Fiyero silenced him with a poisonous glare. Elphaba shrugged, staring at him balefully. "D'you want to…go over there?" he gestured to a point far from Avaric's obnoxiousness, watching her face uncertainly.

Elphaba heaved a deep sigh. "Fine." And she led the way, refusing to follow him for even a step before finally turning to face him, aggravated expression already set in stone.

"Did you read my note?" Fiyero asked, horrified when his voice broke.

She nodded once, and then questioned frostily, "Would you care to explain?"

He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. "Listen, I know I made myself seem like a complete ass." She snorted, and he grimaced. "Yeah. I know, it was bad. But I swear, it's honestly not what you think. It started out—please, please don't get mad—it started out that way. I was bored, and I needed help in class.

"But once I started talking to you for real," he hurried on, for she had made a face and moved to cut in, "I realized that I really did like you for who you are, and I started falling in love with you. And I hoped that maybe you could feel the same way about me, but I didn't see why you would, because you're so much smarter than me and stuff. So I made a list of…ways to try to get you to start feeling the same way, 'coz every time I tried to tell you about the way I feel, it didn't work. So…yeah." He finished lamely, keeping panicked eyes on Elphaba's stunned, pale face (beneath the green, anyway). He had actually written all of this down, experimenting with words and phrases, and then managed to memorize the little speech that resulted because he was afraid that if he just let himself talk, he'd ruin it. Now he hoped it wasn't backfiring, particularly since he had ingeniously managed to forget the end.

"Everyone sit!" Morrible clapped loudly, and Elphaba basically sprinted toward the safety of Nessa, skin still sallow and a bizarre ringing in her ears.

"You okay?" Nessa whispered as Elphaba sank weakly to the ground beside the wheelchair. Nessa took her hand comfortingly. "Did he explain it to you?" The green girl nodded distantly.

"Due to increased socializing in classes and the fact that punishments seem to have absolutely zero effect on you—" Here Morrible glowered for a full thirty seconds, insuring that they could all feel her Horrible Wrath of Terribleness—"I have decided that we will hold a school wide dance. It will take place in this very hall next Saturday evening from 7:30 to midnight. My hope is that this bit of freedom will provide you with an opportunity to spend extra time with one another outside of the classroom setting, hopefully allowing you to get all your chittering done with so that you will be properly focused on Monday." There was a brief pause in which she allowed her words to sink in, but most were still hung up on figuring out whether chittering was an actual word to absorb this thrilling bit of information.

"The dance will be a formal occasion—gentlemen must, at the very least, wear a button-down shirt and nice slacks, and ladies, knee-length dresses or longer. There will be _no _sneakers. Are there any questions?" She glanced around her owlishly, but at last, everyone had realized exactly what was happening _in a mere eight days_, throwing girls into a frenzy about ball gowns and guys into the crucial topic of exactly which pickup lines would work with the Girl of their Dreams.

Elphaba groaned, but Nessa gave a delighted squeal. "Elphie, he can take you!" she whispered. "I'm sure he'll want to!"

"Don't be ridiculous," she hissed in response, and Nessa rolled her eyes. "Nessie, what did he tell you?" she inquired suddenly. After all, if he'd explained the same thing to her sister as he'd told her, then it was probably—possibly—maybe not a lie. Right?

Nessa smirked, a spark of triumph lighting her eyes. "Why? I thought there was nothing going on between you."

Elphaba actually growled. "There _isn't_. But if he's talking about me—which you specifically told me he was—I feel that I've earned the right to know what he's saying."

Nessa gave her a superior stare. "The same thing he told you, I imagine."

"Nessa, you're being utterly ridiculous."

She gave in with a melodramatic sigh. "Fine. He told me that he is in love with you." She raised her eyebrows, silently daring her sister to make up excuses now.

"Oh." Elphaba's voice was faint, and Fiyero was already hurrying toward her.

"Elphaba, I only have one more thing to say, and if you still hate me, just let me know and then I _swear, _I'll leave you alone."

She nodded before she could stop to think.

"Oh." He blinked, having anticipated more of a struggle. "Well…it's more of a question, actually. Would you please come with me to the dance? I want to make everything up to you." He looked at her, the hope in his expression making a lump rise in her throat.

"All right," she whispered, her voice breaking.


	14. Plans, Plans, Plans

Author's Note: I usually don't do this, but...it's done, and I'm so excited that it's done that I just had to post it. Also, I still feel guilty that my updates take so friggin' long. Alright. So, r&r! Wicked is not/never will be mine.

"_Re_ally?" Fiyero's eyes widened. She nodded, attempting to get a hold of herself. Impulsively, he wrapped his arms around her. "You won't regret it, Elphie, I promise." With that, he released her and sprinted off. He only had eight days, after all, to make sure that this was the most perfect night of Elphaba's life, and that would definitely take some planning.

Elphaba stared after him, still uncertain that that had actually just happened. "Did he just--?"

A ridiculously large smile had blossomed on Nessa's face, and she reached out to seize Elphaba's hands. "Fabala! Oh my God!"

Elphaba took an enormous breath, the first she'd taken since Fiyero had hugged her, looking at Nessa with eyes much like a deer in headlights. "Oh, my God," she echoed, so softly that she could barely hear her own voice.

"Come on," Nessa exclaimed, wheeling madly toward the door.

"Where are you going?" Elphaba forced herself to peel her feet off the floor and follow her sister.

"To my room. We're finding you a dress."

Elphaba blanched. "I forgot about that. Nessie, your things won't fit _me._"

"We'll find you _something_." Nessa turned to glare in a very don't-mess-with-me fashion. "Elphie, this is huge. HUGE."

"I know." This had the desired effect of getting Elphaba to shut up, if only because she slipped into a reverie the whole rest of the way to Nessa's room. How, _how_ had this happened? She still couldn't understand why Fiyero should seem so completely sincere about…loving her. He wouldn't take a prank so far as to involve (lie to) her sister. He couldn't. Right?

_FINALLY. Finally, finally, FINALLY. _The word repeated itself over and over in Fiyero's elated head. He let out a rather undignified laugh, throwing the door to his still-vacant room open so hard that it ricocheted off the wall and slammed behind him before throwing himself onto his bed, pulling out another sheet of paper. After all, since this was such a huge deal, he couldn't have himself leaving anything to chance, which meant remembering absolutely everything that he had to do, which meant writing it down, because his memory sucked. End of story.

**List of things to do before Saturday**

**Make sure Galinda has a date**

He grimaced at the thought of this, but he knew that it was crucial. She could certainly find one on her own, but he had to be sure that it would be someone who would distract her from flashing furious glances at him and Elphie all night. And she was just so _picky. _And, thinking of dates…he couldn't have Avaric popping up at random times and making comments about Elphie's complexion constantly (which he would most certainly do, even after—possibly _especially _after--he had worked out that the green girl was there with Fiyero).

**Make sure Avaric has a date**

She'd have to be gorgeous, or she'd never hold his interest for longer than five minutes. He twitched at the thought of all the work that awaited him. He was hardly a matchmaker, after all. But it would be worth it. It had to be. And, well…he definitely owed Nessa, and he had a feeling that just hinting that Boq give her a chance wouldn't really suffice. So it was with a feeling of slight foreboding that he added:

**Get Boq and Nessa together**

Okay. So those would be the hard parts. There were easier things, definitely. Things that he was good at. Like…

**Get Elphie a corsage**

But what type of flowers did she like? Was she even a flower person? Dear God, what if she was allergic? The thought made him freeze up in a panic, and his pen fell to the sheets, drawing a jagged line across the fabric. Well, alright, he just wouldn't think about it. Maybe he'd ask Nessa. She'd already been beyond helpful, so he really might as well. And she'd definitely know her sister's allergies.

Now that he thought about it, he didn't know what else he could even do. Elphaba wasn't like Galinda, not at all. And therefore, he didn't need to match his tie or his shirt to her dress, and his hair wouldn't have to be a specific level of intentionally messy, and his shoes wouldn't need to have a certain amount of shine…The shock of _that_ hit him even harder than the realization that she might be allergic to flowers. Was it possible that all she would require of him was that he treated her well? It seemed almost too easy. He resolved to ask Nessa as soon as possible.

In the meantime, he supposed he needed to launch into another plan. He bit his lip. Operation: Find Galinda a Suitably Hunky/Rich/Charming Date for Next Saturday (FGaSH/R/CDfNS) was definitely not going to be a walk in the park, _and_ its name was seriously lacking. Then again: Operation: Keep Avaric Out of Our Faces by Finding Him a Seriously Hot Chick to Take to the Dance Next Saturday (KAtripleObFHaSHCquadrupletDNS) wouldn't be any easier. Since Nessa was already so smitten with Boq, he supposed Operation: Pay Nessa Back for her Super-Helpful Ability to Understand her Very Confusing Sister by Hooking her Up with Boq (PNBfhS-HAtUhVCSbdoubleHUwB) would be the best place to start. Plus, he'd already planted the thought in Boq's head.

Realizing that he had a ridiculously short amount of time to achieve this, he bounded off his bed and sprinted off to find the Munchkin.

Meanwhile, Nessa was combing painstakingly through her closet, tossing the occasional gown onto the bed. Elphaba picked each up as though examining a dead Animal and repeated the same phrase: "Nessie, how in the name of Lurline do you expect me to fit into this?"

"Have you even tried it on?" was always Nessa's response.

"No, I haven't. I can already tell and it's still on the hanger!"

This happened twelve times in succession before Elphaba would put a single dress on her body. "Put. It. On." Nessa growled, dangling a plum gown with a cinched waist and a square neckline in front of her sister's face.

Having glared at Nessa's bed as the stack of gowns it was wearing grew steadily for approximately half an hour, and having had quite the exciting day, Elphaba was simply too exhausted to put up a fight. "Fine."

It was too short. As were the navy scoop neck with the flared skirt, the shell-pink tunic dress that she wouldn't have worn anyway because of the color, the burgundy renaissance-style gown, the black one that Nessa only _let_ her put on because she knew that Elphaba had color issues, the forest green one that very nearly led to an unpleasant scene (color issues, remember?) and…well, the other six. "Oh, my Oz, I forgot!" Nessa squealed suddenly, wheeling back to her closet.

Elphaba collapsed backward onto the pile. "No, Nessie. I'm done. It's not going to fit."

"Oh, really? Elphie, close your eyes. I'm putting it on you."

"Nessa, stop it."

"No." She wheeled determinedly over, knowing that her sister was a) so exhausted that she couldn't run away; b) under the misguided impression that Nessa wasn't going to be able to force the dress on her; and c) genuinely worrying about what she would wear and feeling ridiculous for worrying about what she would wear because, as she constantly reminded everyone simply by being herself, _she was not Galinda_ (shock, shock).

"What are you doing?" Elphaba sat up suddenly.

"Keep them closed or I'm getting a blindfold," Nessa threatened.

"Where are you going to get a blindfold?" Elphaba scoffed, starting to open her eyes. At once, Nessa snatched a filmy scarf that had been last year's birthday present from…someone…off her dresser and tied it tightly over her sister's eyes.

"What the hell?"

"Shush." She unzipped the dress, managing to get it over Elphaba's head. "Stand, please."

"No."

"Fabala."

"No."

"Please?"

"_No._"

"Elphaba, I'll leave you alone if you just stand up. It's almost all the way on now. And you can hardly go to this _formal dance_ wearing something you already own. You don't have anything formal."

"Yes, I do."

"Like what?"

Silence. Then: "What color is it?"

"Stand and you'll find out soon." Nessa smiled, sensing easy victory. Fiyero had melted her sister's heart to the point where she had agreed to a _date_. Which meant that she really wanted to go, which meant that anything that would prevent her from going (i.e. having nothing to wear, no matter how much she pretended that she did) was a concern that would have to be rectified, and Nessa's marathon dressing session was the best way she had to do that at the moment. After all, she could hardly go shopping in the Emerald City, what with school and everything. And Nessa was fairly sure she had no money anyway, and would be far too stressed out about homework, etc. (whatever) to do this later.

She was right. Elphaba got, however grudgingly, to her feet and allowed Nessa to finish. "There." The girl said triumphantly. "Now follow my voice and you can take the blindfold off when you get to the mirror." Elphaba, still too tired to argue, obeyed. "Stop!" Nessa exclaimed suddenly. "Now look." Elphaba carefully untied the makeshift blindfold, looking in the mirror the moment her eyes were free of the chartreuse silk. It fluttered to the ground as she stared at the girl in the mirror. It certainly couldn't be her.

The dress was white, with thin shoulder straps, the fitted bodice embroidered with delicate golden vines and a flowing skirt that stopped a few inches below the knee. Elphaba had never even considered wearing white, assuming she would look like a vegetable or something equally ridiculous, but somehow, the utter lack of color made her skin look…better. "Do you like it? It looks amazing, Elphie. I've _never_ seen you look so gorgeous." Nessa's voice was hushed.

"I do," Elphaba whispered, pinching the satin between her fingers. "Nessa, when did you buy this?"

"A while ago," she announced. "It was going to be your birthday present, and I forgot. I probably should have made you wait until Saturday to see it, but I just couldn't resist. Plus, if you hadn't liked it…" She shuddered at the very thought.

"It's beautiful," Elphaba breathed uncharacteristically.

LiIiIiIiInEeeeEeEEeeEEeeeEe

Unfortunately, Fiyero still hadn't found Boq by breakfast the next morning. He did, however, find Avaric, who demanded at once, "What was your deal yesterday?"

"What do you mean?"

"Why were you talking to the artichoke?" Avaric's nose wrinkled in distaste. "For God's sake, you're _Fiyero Tiggular_. What do you need with garden vegetables?"

"She is _not_ a garden vegetable!" Fiyero insisted heatedly.

Avaric stared at him. "Uh, whatever you say. What do you need with her?" A pause. "Oh. You're failing history, aren't you?"

"Well, yeah, but—" Fiyero cut himself off. Telling Avaric about his life was never, ever a good idea. He could just…find out through the grapevine or something. But he wasn't finished.

"Understandable. But still, man, talking to her in public? Your reputation is done for."

"Av, you sound exactly like Galinda." Fiyero informed him, grimacing.

"Do not!" Avaric protested childishly. "Seriously, why would you talk to your girlfriend's worst enemy, anyway?"

"Uh…" Problem. Problem. Problem. Apparently there was a quick choice to be made, and Fiyero was really bad with quick choices. "What…are you talking about…?" _Yes. That's right. Bide your time and it'll all be okay. _The more cynical voice that lived in Fiyero's head snorted at this optimism, and he pulled a face.

"Are you okay?" Avaric inquired, tilting his head and surveying his friend.

"Yeah!" Fiyero blurted out immediately.

"…Okay." Avaric looked disbelieving, but as it wasn't their custom to really tell each other anything of any importance, he just shrugged it off.

"Who are you taking Saturday?" Fiyero asked after the silence had stretched on long enough to be suitable for a subject change. Also because now it actually _was _Saturday, and thus there were only seven days to throw three different (and utterly compatible—hopefully) couples together, find out if Elphie was allergic to flowers, and make sure he wasn't going to do something stupid enough to make her change her mind.

Avaric shrugged. "I'll find someone." So carefree about it. Fiyero shook his head. But again, he wasn't finished. "You're with the hottest girl at Shiz anyway. Don't get what she sees in you." The words were teasing enough that Fiyero just rolled his eyes.

And then he had an epiphany.

Dear, sweet Oz, he wasn't _with _Galinda anymore!

And Avaric thought she was the hottest girl at Shiz!

And he needed to find them both dates for Saturday!

And he was overusing exclamation points in his thoughts!

Oh. _Oops._

"About that…"

Avaric blinked. "About what?"

"Galinda. I'm…we broke up."

Silence.

"A few days ago."

Silence.

"So…yeah."

Silence. Then: "You cannot be serious."

"Yes. I can." A deep breath. "So technically, you can take her, if you want."

"Dude. Do you realize how screwed you are?"

"What?"

"Yeah. Now who are you supposed to go with? You can't go with any of her _friends_, because as quickly as they'd stab her in the back to go with you, then they'd have that weird girly conscience thing going on all night and it wouldn't be any fun. Then again, most of the rest of the girls in the school hate her even though they think she's the most amazing thing since the Wonderful Wizard, so maybe you'll be fine. As for her…yeah. I'll definitely take her."

Well, that was easy. Really, really weird, but easy. "Av?"

"Yeah."

"You just sounded like a complete girl just now."

"Shut the hell up."


	15. Whaaaat?

**Author's Note: Oh my goodness, you guys. I suck. Seriously. Two years? A two year, unannounced hiatus? I AM SO SORRY. I hope this helps at least a little. I'm going to do my best to finish this sometime soonish. It's just hard, with school and all that. NOT that that's an excuse, I know...**

**Also, there's a poll on my author page. If you don't hate me...vote? Anyway...read and review!**

"So anyway. You should probably ask her, like, now," Fiyero suggested, trying and failing to act casual.

"Remind me again why you care," Avaric said suspiciously, narrowing his eyes.

"…Because I'm…a good friend?" Fiyero tried, flashing Avaric a would-be innocent grin. Well, he could go deal with Boq and Nessa now if he really wanted to, but he had a feeling that with Galinda, even his oh-so-perfectly devised plan could very easily be blown to smithereens, so he kind of wanted to see the whole thing happen.

"Uh huh." Avaric arched an eyebrow. "I'll ask her later tonight. But seriously, the curiosity is killing me. Is it possible that Fiyero Tiggular is going to go to a function alone?"

Fiyero decided that it would be easiest to ignore the fact that Avaric was still acting beyond bizarre and just consider his question. Telling the truth was probably the best way to go, because knowing his luck Elphaba would find out that he hadn't told anyone and assume that it was because he was ashamed of her when exactly the opposite was the case. Whatever that meant. On the other hand, maybe she'd get pissed if he did tell people, because she didn't want anyone to know until she actually showed up with him. At long last, he blurted out the neutral, "You'll see her Saturday?" and immediately wondered why he only seemed capable of talking like Galinda, Pfannee and Shenshen in the midst of gossip mode today.

"You don't have a date," Avaric accused, his amusement evident. "It's cool, Yero, just tell Galinda you were confused or something. If you are, don't wait too long though, 'coz then I'll have already asked her and you'll be screwed." Fiyero blinked, wondering a) why Avaric even cared about his love life at all, and b) how he'd managed to some off as sympathetic and arrogant at the same time.

Instead of asking either of these questions, however, he replied, "Not asking Galinda. Gotta go!" and made his escape at top speed.

LLLLLLINNNNNNNE

So, good, you've got a dress." Nessa exclaimed brightly. "But do you have shoes that match?"

Elphaba, who had been in the midst of returning to her traditional black, froze. "Shoes?"

"Oh, for Lurline's sake," Nessa groaned, tipping her head back to gaze in utmost frustration at the ceiling. "It's late, Fabala, we'll deal with shoes in the morning."

And true to her word, she arrived at Elphaba's door with the sun the next morning, lap laden with shoeboxes, and pounded on said door until her extremely irritable-looking sister threw it open. "Nessa, what the hell?" she demanded. "It's six thirty in the morning!"

"Like you were sleeping," Nessa answered matter-of-factly, rolling her eyes. "Anyway, I brought you shoes," she added, as though her purpose weren't perfectly obvious.

"Nessa," Elphaba replied slowly, now speaking with world-weary exasperation, "if none of your dresses fit me, why would your shoes be any different?"

"Oh. I don't always buy shoes in my size," the younger Thropp answered, pure innocence. "Since I don't need to actually walk in them, I buy them in whatever size I can find."

"Great," Elphaba answered with a sigh, only half sarcastically. "Well, the Princess is still asleep, and I doubt we're going to want to deal with her dramatics when she finally rolls out of bed, so do you mind taking this to your room?"

"Not at all," Nessa answered merrily, spinning her chair around before Elphaba could offer to help her with any of the boxes and wheeling down the hall.

What followed was not quite as unpleasant as the day before had been, seeing as Nessa had fewer pairs of shoes than dresses, and only a select few (read: about eight) actually matched the dress that Elphaba was wearing. She had reached the final pair of said shoes when there was a decidedly unexpected knock on the door. "Coming!" Nessa sang out, carefully steering around the boxes strewn all over her room to pull it (the door, not the mess of boxes) open.

"Nessa, hi!" The voice was familiar. Far, far too familiar. Stunned, Elphaba tumbled ungracefully off the bed, narrowly missing impaling herself on one of her sister's abandoned, spike-heeled shoes and deciding to remain there, as though not moving would render her invisible. "Okay, so, I'm freaking out a little. Can I come in?"

"Are you looking for Elphaba?" Nessa asked wickedly, her amusement poorly masked.

"No…but I did want to ask you something about her, and it's really, really important."

"Well you've found her," Nessa replied, cackling madly, "and she's only trying on one last pair of shoes, so she's free for any sort of…questioning you may want to pose to her."

Traitor. Elphaba shot a murderous glare at her sister's back and stood, having apparently forgotten that she was wearing only one gold lace-up sandal, and resultantly teetering and falling back onto the bed with an obnoxious thump.

"Elphaba!" Fiyero exclaimed as Nessa zoomed backwards to let him in. "Hi." This came out slightly less dashingly than he'd intended, and he attempted to make up for it by smiling as charmingly as humanly possible.

"Fiyero," she answered, inclining her head a little in a desperate attempt to maintain her dignity.

"Soooo, I have been dying to know," he began, walking nearer to her and trying not to wince at how much he sounded like Galinda/Avaric (yesterday, apparently…Lurline, there must have been something incredibly strange in the water). Why couldn't he just be casual with her, damnit?

Elphaba, of course, picked up on his incredible suaveness and sophistication (cough cough) and fixed him with a beady stare. "Dying to know what, exactly?"

"What…are your favorite flowers?" he finished sheepishly.

She narrowed her eyes. "Why?"

Bewildered by her apparent suspicion, he shifted from foot to foot. "Be—because I wanted to get them for you!"

A tiny smile crossed her lips, but it was gone so quickly that he convinced himself he'd imagined it. Well, that was more likely than him succeeding in making her smile, anyway, at least lately. "You don't have to worry about that," she replied flatly.

He cast a help-me look toward Nessa, but as it turned out, this gaze ended up harmlessly piercing thin air, because Nessa had vanished. "But I want to," he insisted childishly. "And if you don't tell me what they are, I'll just ask Nessa. She likes helping me." He pondered sticking out his tongue, but decided that it was a little extreme.

She contemplated for a second, apparently realized how very serious he was, and rolled her eyes. "Fine, then. I like…poppies."

"Sweet." He pulled a pen out of his back pocket and scrawled the word _poppies_ on the palm of his hand. Then he smiled pleasantly at Elphaba, who was eyeing him much as one looks at someone whom they have just discovered is utterly insane. "Whaaat? I don't want to forget," he explained, as though this made perfect sense. And, in fact, in his mind, it did.

Elphaba was silent, yanking off her shoe and getting to her feet, snatching both sandals off the ground as she moved toward the door. "I should go."

"Wait!" he exclaimed. "Are you mad at me still?" He wasn't sure what made him ask the question, and he was well aware that his wording made very little sense (also, if she were still mad at him, he was one hundred percent positive she wouldn't be going to the dance with him) and it was the first thing that he could think of to ask in his desperate attempt to prevent her from leaving.

"No, she answered, and now he was sure she smiled ever so slightly as she left. Fiyero plunked himself onto Nessa's bed in complete confusion, staring helplessly at the empty air where she'd been standing.

"What did you do?" Nessa asked, wheeling back in as though she'd simply been hiding out in a darkened corner of the hallway right outside of her room (…not that she had been or anything) and attempting to gather up her shoes. Immediately, Fiyero knelt on the floor to help.

"Nothing, I swear! I just asked what her favorite flowers are, and she left!"

"Poppies," Nessa answered promptly. "Would you mind putting these away for me?"

"Of course not. And, um…right, well, she told me, and then she left."

"She what?" Nessa's jaw dropped and she shook her head. "Dear, sweet Lurline, is it a full moon or something?"

He blinked. "Is that weird?"

"Do you know her?" she shot back. "Oh…and thanks."

"Any time." He beamed. "But yeah…I should probably go, because I have some matchmak—heyyy. Are you excited for Saturday?"

Really, he should have known better. Nessa forced a completely unbelievable smile after seriously considering screaming at the top of her lungs and kicking him out of her room. "Yes, I suppose I am," she answered finally.

His face fell as he (finally) realized his mistake. "It'll be fun, Ness, I promise!" And with no ado whatsoever, he ran off to find Boq.

HEY, LOOK, A CHANGE IN SCENE! HOW FANTASTIC!

_Ha! Found her! _Avaric smirked and sped up, putting himself directly behind Galinda on the path she was quickly tracing through the dirt in her kitten-heels. She was walking alone, unusually enough, and he was fairly certain that if he didn't take advantage of the moment, he'd have to seriously be an idiot. The way he'd set the whole situation up resulted in (as planned) a direct collision with the typically perky blonde, who was so stunned that she wasn't alone that he actually managed to knock her off balance without really hitting her hard. Instinctively, he wrapped an arm around her waist to keep her on her feet. "Miss Galinda. I'm so sorry," he told her smoothly, offering a tiny smirk.

"Ugh, it's..." (she looked at him, and her eyes widened for a split second) "it's...quite alright," she finished, a little breathlessly, lowering her head and regarding him through her lashes. It was a move that had caused many a man before him to swoon, and Avaric recognized that fact. He also knew exactly what it meant, and had no intention of letting the opportunity that it presented pass him by.

"Are you alright?" he asked, in his best seduction!voice, leading her suavely over to conveniently placed bench.

"Fine, fine," she assured him, smiling. "I was just a bit...startled, is all."

_Damn_, but she had a gorgeous smile. Not that, you know, it affected him or anything. For Lurline's sake, he had dated, like, a million girls. But whatever, it didn't mean he couldn't appreciate beauty when he saw it. "Well, good." Ohhhkay, so there were a few ways to play this from here. But which one would lead to the desired...oh, who was he kidding? She'd just broken up with her boyfriend, and there was a major social event coming up. She wasn't going to care how he played it.

Probably.

No. Definitely.

Where the hell was all this random uncertainty coming from?

"So, Miss Galinda, I heard a rumor earlier today," he murmured in his best 'I've got a secret' tone, leaning a bit closer to her, as though it was imperative to keep it between them.

"Oh?"

"Indeed." He glanced around (even though he knew the area was utterly deserted), and then whispered, "Something about your boyfriend being completely oblivious to what an amazing thing he had with you." It was insanely cheesy, but he figured, what the hell. Couldn't hurt to flatter her. After all, her ego must have taken quite the beating.

But she drew back. "What?"

Uh oh. "What I meant was, do you have a date for the dance on Saturday?" Insert the charming grin that had the potential to successfully render 98 percent of the heterosexual female population speechless here.

But Galinda Upland was not just any girl, and she huffed poutily. "I fail to see how that is any of your concern."

What. In the world. Was going on? Had he somehow become a different person without noticing it? "I'm really, terribly sorry, Miss Galinda. I didn't mean to offend you."

She had figured as much. Triumphant, she repressed a smile with effort and tossed her hair, fixing him with a frosty glare. "What did you intend, then, Master Avaric?"

"I had hoped, perhaps, if it interested you...that you might accompany me to the dance."

"And why would I do that?"

"Aside from making me the happiest person at Shiz," he began smoothly, lifting her hand to his lips and kissing it gently, "it would make Fiyero insane with jealousy, I'm sure."

"Are you so certain that I wasn't the one to end the relationship?" she challenged, but they both knew, when she didn't pull her hand free, that he had won.

"Not at all. But even if you were, you wouldn't just skip the dance, would you?"

"Never. So..." (she smirked slyly) "I suppose I could go with you, then."

"Is that a yes?"

She got to her feet and started to walk away, and he let her. But just before she disappeared from view, she turned around, and one word found its way back to him. "Yes."


End file.
